..|♥|.. My On|y Hear† ..|♥|..

Among other things

2012-02-02T20:44:00.003+08:00

Among other things

(like my new accessory? Me like )

So i've been meaning to blog for quite some time now.
And i guess this is me finally getting round to it.

I've been looking at my previous posts and i realized i never spoken about my class
(4 Jasmin)

Fact ; I really do like my class.

I cant put my finger on exactly why that is.
But i feel so comfortable and at home with them
Its just such a pleasure to be around them.
I feel bubbly and happy with them.

despite there being the only 2 people i hate in the entire ~~school.~~ universe.
(besides rapist and mass-murderers. or murderers in general of course)
despite there being the lamest people i've ever had to endure.
despite there being the lousiest teachers i've ever encountered in my 16 years of living.

I have never felt this way about any of the classes i've been too
(excluding primary school of course, i had the most genuine insanely happy childhood a girl could wish for)
till now.

Main point is.

I LIKE MY CLASS. I GENUINELY LIKE IT.

However ...

fact ; the teachers i have is absolutely and unmistakeably dreadful.

I just get so frustrated.
WHY? Cant they assign us proper teachers?
WHY?

Sigh.

It's been a whole month now, give and take.

And i feel like i barely learned anything.
It annoys me to no end.
I have NEVER had such bad teachers ALL AT ONCE.
And trust me, i've been through my fair share of bad teachers.

Moving on to more pleasant things,
(Just talking about teachers makes me frustrated all over again)

I proudly present my album cover my little tigers.
(my triplet cousins)

*pun intended in the picture.

I am rather proud if i say so myself :')
Started on an entirely blank canvas on Photoshop.

So yes,
despite the ugly emotional crisis i've been going through this sad sad year.
I am still alive and smiling as wide as i can.
Even though, im about as unhappy as a pimply backside.

Everything's wrong,
i feel like we ended something we never started.

Bad birthday

2012-01-25T00:34:00.006+08:00

Bad Birthday

I guess you have good ones.
And also not so good ones eh?

It's funny how the closest of friends wished me the latest
and the friends whom i rarely keep in touched with
bothered to TEXT ME A DAY EARLIER.

I guess this shows me who cares and who doesn't?

But i don't blame anyone tho,
(so please dont go feeling guilty)
im sure everyone was busy with CNY preparations.

You know, sometimes i just don't get it.

You feel most lonely when everyone is right there with you.

Such a depressing birthday and new year.
I guess it's a fact that as you grow older,
you see the world and people around you in an entirely new light.

Rainbows aren't so colorful anymore,
Singing birds aren't so cheerful anymore,
Smiles isn't easily given anymore.

PFFFT. enough with sad poetry.
No one needs them on such a ~~supposedly~~ happy occasion anyway.

Sorry loves, for such a depressing post on a happy day.

Nevertheless, here's a smile for a brighter day ahead.

: )

A sad note,
A heavy heart,
A silent tear,
A fake smile.

Catching up

2012-01-19T23:48:00.007+08:00

Catching up

Okay so, i know in my previous post
I mentioned that i wanted a pencil case for my birthday.

And knowing all you cheapo's out there.
Everyone wants to get me a pencil case.
{by everyone i meant what little friends i have because let's get real. No one gives me presents for my birthday besides mummy and daddy}
Because not only is it cheap, its useful and i would appreciate it.

Haaah, i dont blame you.
But if you haven't bought it yet STOP GETTING ME PENCIL CASES .

(no one has actually given me a pencil case
but everyone is telling me they would,
could this be a lie?
Could i end up with no pencil cases in the end?)

Instead you can get me a (brown/red) backpack for school yeah yeah?

or maybe a nice pair of size 6 sports shoes?
*cough*
(i do know that this contradicts to my previous post about me not expecting expensive gifts.
In my defense, i never claimed i wasn't a hypocrite)

A few more (expensive) ideas for you.

TEE HEE :D

Okay i didn't just come here to blog about my birthday wishlist for the second time.

Surprise surprise.
There's more!

We (my volleyball team) placed 4th in the district level competition.
Which means we are no where close to representing the district
for the state competition.
It wasn't really depressing.
I saw it coming.

But that's okay
We'll do better next year.
(senior year baby!)
We have to.

And well, lastly.

Happy Chinese New Year Kiddos.

Time for endless tossing of ''yee sang''
money counting.
wardrobe changing
family gatherings

AND AND AND PEAKING DUCK nom-ing

*licks away drool*

Francisco Lachowski is the goof-iest dude ever,
So adorable but his voice is ....

Absurdity

2012-01-12T23:05:00.013+08:00

Absurdity

{feeling frustrated, disappointed, depressed & angry}

Oh, hello.
I know i havent been blogging much.
That's because school started!

And not only am i dissapointed to no end about the teachers who are teaching me.
They all seem to think we're not interested in studying.
They don't even look as though they'd want to teach us.
And and and,
for the first time in my life.
I am hearing the teachers complain that our class is too quiet.

What is this?
Like really?

Can you make up your mind?
There isin't such a thing as a perfect class.
Im sure you'd prefer a quiet class compared to a zoo of a class.
So shut up and stop complaining about everything
(yes, like me)

And also, teachers need to know their boundaries on the students' privacy.
Teachers in general. Not only teachers from my class or school.

Dear teachers,

FACEBOOK IS NOT A SOURCE OF INFORMATION.

What we do on the internet, or anywhere outside of school grounds is absolutely NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Stick your damn noses somewhere else please? This is breach of privacy.

Do understand, that we're already restricted to school rules during the 7 hours of school during the day. We sure as hell don't need to be watching over our backs every single minute of our lives, just in case some teacher is busy lurking around facebook.

To be honest, I feel disgusted that you people would stoop so low to find the latest piece of gossip just so that you can go around telling the entire staff about how you found out and how you are doing the "right" thing by confronting the students or giving us a huge talk about not being old enough, about how we should set our priorities to studying, or about how we should consider counseling.

There is a high possibility that whatever you're telling us, is the right thing to do.

But the best part about being a teenager is to make mistakes, and to be reckless and free.

Sincerly,
Your student.

So if there is ever a day whereby a teacher approaches me for something i said/posted/uploaded/confessed on facebook.
I would convey they exact same message but maybe a little less blunt.

And more to add on the list of things i am rather upset about.

Is the fact that MSSD (district level) Volleyball is next week monday.
(16/01/2012)

And my seniors are panicking
and in my opinion, are making the worst decisions ever.

I wont go into detail to bore the hell out of you,
but as a general statement.

Volleyball is a team sport.
There are 12 people in a team.
not 4 or 6

And even though (to them) i have no talent, or skill or knowledge for the game.
I definitely have passion for it.
And to see you treat us this way,
is just ... really depressing and shitty to say the least.

Leaving this post with a heavy heart.
because i might give up something i really enjoy-ed. past tense.

P/S : Boyce Avenue is and always will be food for my soul, especially during times like this.

You may fall,
but i swear that it'll all get better,
if you swear it was worth it

PRESENTS?

2012-01-04T22:38:00.006+08:00

PRESENTS?

(as you can see, i used up all the good pictures and im only left with the grainy over exposed ones )

Okay, so SOMEONE'S BIRTHDAY is right around the corner.
And if you haven't gotten a present yet
(it's okay you still have time to redeem yourself)

here's a head's up for you guys.
On what's on my birthday wishlist.

Becauseeee.
Lately, i've been getting alot of random things that i would never use.
And i wouldn't want to waste your money on something i'd never use let alone touch in my entire life.

But dont see it the wrong way tho.
It's not like i dont appreciate you
going out of your way to go pick something out for me
-touched-
(unless you found some crappy shit lying around your house and decided to give it to me as my present.
Then i'd be dissapointed. DISSAPOINTED i tell you)

But i really do appreciate not the present so much.
but the money (which is not easy to get. Trust me i know)
and more importantly the time you spent looking around
or even thinking bout what to get me

That's something i am grateful and appreciative of.

So on with the list yeah?

1. A PENCIL BOX

Doesn't even need to be above RM30 or anything.
But guys. PLEASE.

We're not in preschool anymore yeah?

A simple solid color (just not green. please please please) one like this would do fine.
Or something with prints
Or anything laaa.
(Anything BUT the round kiddie sort of pencil box like in the 1st picture with the giant 'X')

2. HAMSTER FOOD/HAY/TREATS/BATHING SAND

Just walk into a pet shop and pick out any sort of food or sand for my hammies.
HAHAHA.
I wont judge you, i swear.
At least that's something i would use, and be grateful for :D
No kidding.

3. CLOTHES

This is rather tricky to get.
But anything's fine. Really :)
(except maybe your g-ma's pyjamas. Haha, kidding)

That's about it actually.

I hope you don't see this as me being demanding (which i obviously am)
or not appreciative of whatever you gave me in the past.

To me, its the truly thought that counts.
So if you got me something (anything) last year.
That's more than good enough in my book.

P/S : The ONLY two people that i despise just happens to be in my class of 2012.
HOW WONDERFULLY FANTASTIC.
ughhhh.

Here's to a new year,
a new beginning.

Jealousy

2011-12-30T15:27:00.006+08:00

Jealousy

Okay, i've made a promise to myself.
If im single and he is single in 2013.
I'll ask him to prom.

SHAMELESSLY.

Because despite me being extremely old school.
(I strongly believe that the guy should do all the asking of dates, prom and whatnot)

I also believe in the saying,

God can only help you, if you help yourself.

Or something along those lines.

What's the worst thing that can happen anyway?

Get rejected?
FINE.
(no. not fine. i CANNOT stand rejection)

But what if something good comes out of it?
Who knows, i could be walking down the isle with the hottest guy that night.
And be all

"YOU JELLY BITCH?"

Haaah, and even if i really do get rejected.
Then at least i know i tried
Rather than sitting at home regretting.

Okay. It's settled.
I will do it.

Why am i so unattractive?
Fml.

MERRY CHRISTMAS 2011

2011-12-27T02:06:00.004+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS 2011

*Merry belated Christmas!*

Sorry it took me so long, it was a hectic week.

Everyone deserves a kiss on Christmas.
(unless you're a phedo, mass murderer or a sadist. Then you don't.)

Here's to a new year and a new beginning.

Merry christmas sweethearts & have a happy new year.

every second is a highlight

Results

2011-12-23T01:04:00.001+08:00

Results

For those of you who din't know.
I got straight A's for my PMR.

YAAAAAAAAAAYYY.

okay. nothing to celebrate about.
I just happen to be one in the 7% whom scored straight A's.
No big deal.

And that's what my father said.

Okay, this is far enough.

Why the fuck does his opinion even matter to me anyway?
Why do i feel the need to strive to please him?
Why do i keep giving it my best just to make him proud?

You know what.
Enough is enough.
All this while, his been saying i've never put enough effort into my studies.

When i was 8, i got 5th place in class.

he told me, i could have gotten top 3 if i tried harder.

When i was 10, i got 2nd place in class.
With a moderately good average percentage which was 92.2%

he told me, i could have gotten first if i tried harder.

When i'm 15, i got fucking straight A's.

he told me, i am JUST one in the 7% which managed to score straight A's.
Which is apparently a HUGE percentage in his book.

Meet my dad :

THIS ^^^

Know what dad?
Im happy, wait.no.
EXTREMELY THRILLED about my results

So if YOU are not happy then.
May you live a very unhappy & unfulfilled life then.

never enough.

Huge Ass Disappointment.

2011-12-21T22:18:00.002+08:00

Huge Ass Disappointment.

Mom's friend's kids & I (and dog)

Oh, i forgot to mention that i went to Penang together with my mum's friend and their entire family.
I've known them since i was like 7, so they're practically cousins.

Anyway, since i was a kid i use to go to Penang annually during the sch holidays
and stay in the only suite that my parents were willing to pay for.
And take hour long jacuzzi baths
(because im poor and cannot afford the luxury of having jacuzzi's at home OKAY not because i like to brag)
And eat all day and night

and then NOM NOM somemore like a freggin carnivorous dinosaur

But since everyone's schedule got crazy,
we eventually stopped going.

But everything was remedied because, after yearrrrrs of missing tradition
We finally made it this year!

And god help me i was SO EXCITED about the food, and the suite.
But mainly the food, so dont judge.

only to find out that the food doesn't give you the

"gastronomical orgasmic blow your mind"

feeling anymore anymore.

It's like having a huge FAT "DISAPPOINTMENT" chop being stamped on your forehead.

To be honest, its not worth the travel anymore.
If i wanted good Penang food like Prawn mee & Fried keuy teow
i would rather just go to Little Penang in Curve or Mid Valley.

And before things could get worst.

I had food poisoning.
On my 2nd night.

AND NO, It's not the minor food poisoning
whereby you take a shit and everything's a-okay again.

I was vomiting the crap out of myself for a good 5 hours without stopping
While my teeth clatter and shiver to no end.
Till it got to a point whereby i think dying was a better option

And to much displeasure, it was so hard to find a god damned 24-hour clinic
it was like finding hamster poop in hay.

So i ended up in the ONLY freaking 24-hour clinic on the ENTIRE ISLAND (sarcasm)
after driving around for a ~~good~~ hour and a half. (fact)

Took 3 jabs and all was good after that.

yes yes, you're not interested.

Pictures nao.

Stayed in Bayview Beach Resort for the first two nights.
Wish i took more pictures tho.

You'll see what's the shovel for.

Ta-da!

WHAT IS THIS SORCERY?
She's so darn cute. Ugh.Their family.

Then we found this dog that followed us down the entire beach and wouldn't stop wagging it's tail.
Dawww, it digs a hole in the sand before it curls up and sleep at night.
Para-glided for the 2nd time in my life :)
Random shot of a guy dancing on his horse.
Random shots.
Beach sunset shots.

Then on the third day my "cousins" went home and we moved to Gurney Hotel
(Ahhh, jacuzzi. Life's good.)

Gurney Drive

Disgusting rubbish thrown by hooligans

The gurney hotel.

And it's infinity pool.The kids pool area which i use to LOVE.

Spice Garden found on the recreation floor.

And the most surprising thing ever, FLUFFY BUNNIES.
They were happily hopping around the poolside and the spice garden when i found them one night.
They're locked up during the day tho.

The view from my room. Gorgeous gorgeous gorgeous.
(it's blur cause my cam doesn't take good night shots)
The best designed mall i have ever been to in Malaysia to date.

Straits Quay.

Damn, im impressed.
There were literally 40-50 yachts parked at the marina.
I was totally in awe.
Felt as if i was walking through a movie set.
The ID of this mall is just superb.
But due to low light, the shots i got was horrible.

This was the only pass-able one.

That's about it.
Okay, the post is long enough
it took me ages to finish it.

P/S: PMR RESULTS TMR (22/12/11)

i will get straight A's. I will get straight A's. I will get straight A's.

Please oh please oh please.

Procrastinating

2011-12-17T01:29:00.003+08:00

Procrastinating

Okay, so im supposed to go on and on about my recent trip to Penang.
But before i do i'd have to edit the pictures,
upload them onto Photobucket/flikr,
THEN write a long ass blog post about my trip.

When i have other more interesting things to share.
(okay, they aren't really all that interesting)

ANYWAY,
You'd just have to be patient with this pretty picture of me.
AHAHAHAHA.
Such obvious self-praising

When i absolutely loathe people for doing just that.
(but then i already knew i ~~was~~ am a hypocrite)

And there you go,
Yes, its also my current profile picture on facebook.
three gold stars for noticing

Now go ahead, and like it.
It's your duty as a friend.
-nods-

Just kidding.
but seriously

A little summer fling wont hurt

Off i go

2011-12-10T10:38:00.006+08:00

Off i go

*no picture cause im late late LATE*

Okay, it's 10.39am and im leaving at 11.30am and i haven't even started packing for my 5D4N trip to Penang.

Hmmmmm.

So i guess this would just be a short post telling you guys i would MIA for a bit.
Would be back on the 14th of December.
MISS ME okay.
Whatever, i know you won't admit it.
But you know the truth :P

And do click my ads, i think no one bothers bout them anymore ):
Show some love you mean people.

mon amour au revoir

Sweet sailing on a hot summer's day.

Phone Jinx

2011-12-04T18:09:00.005+08:00

Phone Jinx

(I was ACTUALLY crying at that moment btw)

So... it's been a year since i got my phone.

The Nokia C6-01

However RIGHT AFTER the warranty is ended.
(Ended on 14th November 2011)
it decided to go fucking cranky.

FABULOUSLY SMART NO?

Thus, i took it to the official Nokia care centre and asked them how much would it cost to repair it.

They told me the screen chip is spoiled.
So they would have to change the entire screen.
So the total price i would have to fork out would be

RM 320

THREE bloody HUNDRED AND TWENTY.

Which is almost half the price of my phone.
I might as well just get a BRAND NEW phone with that money ?!

SIGH.

So much for saving for my DSLR.

I was really hoping i would be able to get it by early next year.
REALLY HOPING.

But now, looking at the situation
I would probably get my DSLR when im in my fifties or something.

Jeeez, this is really getting on my nerves.

The first phone i bought with my own PRECIOUS CASH.
Was RM800
And i lost it after a year.

So i bought the SAME phone for the SECOND TIME for Rm700
And it too was lost AFTER A YEAR.

*screw you beverly. What is hell wrong with you?!*

Which brings me to my third and most expensive phone yet.
My current phone which i bought for RM880

AND AFTER A YEAR, IT DECIDED TO GO BERSERK ON ME

Wonderful history of phones.
Just absolutely awesome.

I dont think any other person in the world had the opportunity to go through these HORRIBLE phone-losing experiences EVER.

But you know,
me being extremely "LUCKY"
Had that 1 in a billion chance of being that person.

YAY ME.

I hate you fate.

Sore Spot

2011-11-29T22:38:00.005+08:00

Sore Spot

Symbolical.
(my first gif btw)

I.hurt.

I know i promised happy posts.
But my self-therapy isn't working.
(obviously)

Whenever i see something related to my first love.
I feel as if my heart is reliving a scene from the past.
The hurt, the anger, the disappointment.

It's just not a pretty sight.

I still miss him despite it being a long time now.
And despite everything, i still wish everything ended differently.

FML

I sound like a pathetic love despo.

It's beyond me why i can't forget after all this time.
Other ex-es din't hurt this much.
WHY must this one?

The most bitter sweet memory i have with me still haunts me after 2 years.

I.desperately.need.this.to.stop.

I could have sworn my heart stopped the moment i saw him post something..

I HATE THIS.
God, or someone up there please, im on my knees, end my misery for good.

I hate what you put me through,
but it's because of you i know how much i could love.

Kitty Rescue

2011-11-24T22:49:00.005+08:00

Kitty Rescue

Daisy approves

Okay, so i know my blog has been full of hate and anger lately.
And

that.has.got.to.stop.~~like.seriously.~~

After giving it "serious" thought
The world definitely has more than enough of hate without me constantly adding to the pool of vengeance.

So im consoling myself with therapy.
Self-therapy of course.

Anyway, as my first step to spreading cheer !

I have three living breathing ADORABLE kitties for giveaway.
No kidding.

Meet the giveaways!

Daisy

Frisky

Brownie

Tiger!
(AHAHA, okay tiger is not for for giveaway. But if you adopt the cat you can have it free!! [er, i think] )

They're all females btw.
To be perfectly honest, i can't tell the difference between Brownie and Frisky by their pictures.
They might even be the same cat for god's sake.
Ahhha.

Well, point is.
These three very unfortunate kitties are up for grabs if any of you would like to adopt one.
Please do, its 100% free and i would even PERSONALLY DELIVER them to you.
Even pet shops don't offer that service.

They are wonderful adorable kitties which my sister saved from under her car.
Some blind asshole driver nearly ran over them.
Jeez.

When she found them, they were wet, hungry, thirsty and dirty.
We went through the trouble of feeding them with fresh milk, dog food (its the only thing we have) and even bathing them.
Okay, cats don't bathe.
So we wiped them down real clean.

So as of now, they're just really thin playful and perfectly healthy kittens.

They might not have an official certificate, nor are they a pure bred.
But hey, you don't love something by labeling them.

These kittens are such darlings we're tempted to keep them to ourselves.
However, we already have a 13 year old dog (as you know very well) who has been with us for a very long time now.
And it really is not possible to have these kittens and my dog live together.

He (my doggie) nearly tore off one of the kitten's head when we let him too close.
Sigh.

If no one wants to adopt them, or even enquire about these babies then they would be sent to PAWS by 26/11/2011 (Saturday) because my mum is throwing a fit ever since we brought the cats in our house cause she's not a fan of cats.

And as cruel as fate is, if they don't get adopted by 2 weeks in PAWS they would be put down.
a.k.a

SHOT.DEAD.

So please please please.
If you always wanted a pet, or if you know someone who would like them.
PLEASE, let me know! And quick.

More pictures of these darlings.
I mean how can you not want one?!

Contact info :-

Name : Beverly
Contact No : 03-77319032
Email : starfire_crystal@hotmail.com

I know my chances are slim to the point of 0% of anyone adopting these baby dolls but i have to try at least )':

Oh life, how can you be so cruel to something so new and pure to the world.

P/S :
On a very awkward note, i had the weirdest most bizarre dream of all time yesteday.
I was kissing my best friend.
(thank god it was a guy a least)
BUT STILL
Oh yuck yuck yuck.
And it was no friendly kiss.
Double the yucks.
YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK.
I just can't get it out of my head.
SUPER AWKWARD,
and worst of all, i just can't stop replaying that horrifying scene.
Which scares me even more.
Oh god help me.

The world is an ugly place,
for those who don't fight for their right to be in it.

Cranky

2011-11-14T21:04:00.004+08:00

Cranky

Look into my eyes long enough, and you'll see the fiery hells burning.

Okay, i know im putting off my shopping haul post.
That's cause im extremely lazy to take pictures of my gazillion new clothes from a thousand different places then explain about it.

And i too know that i've been a total complaining snappish bitch lately.
But goddamn if everyone can't stop bugging me for something.

FRIENDS, FAMILY, WORK, BOSS, HAMSTERS.

CAN YOU JUST SHUT UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE?

"BEVERLY, WHERE ARE THE ____ ?!"
"BEVERLY, WHY ISIN'T THE _____?!"
"BEVERLY, WHY DIN'T YOU _____ YET?!"
"BEVERLY, I WANT IT NOW. CAN YOU DO IT NAOOOOOO?!"

"BEVERLY, MY UNICORN JUST FELL DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS. CAN YOU FIX IT'S HORN?"
"BEVERLY, I THINK MY BUTTOCKS ARE ON FIRE. GET ME A GLASS OF WATER"
"BEVERLY, I THINK THE SKY TURNS BLUE AFTER MIDNIGHT."

-takes in a deep breath-

okay look.

if you're so bloody impatient about wanting something then well that's your problem not mine is it? So why the hell are you yapping to no end about it? If you want it now, you can jolly well do it yourself and you can stop screaming in my ear. If you think waiting for minute or two would cause you Neuropsychiatric conditions well then, you deserve it. If you want something done perfectly, i am trying, but you telling me a thousand and one times isn't helping. On the contrary, its making me feel like stuffing a bloody tape recorder up that arse of yours.

HYPOTHESIS : The more you ask for something, the more you bug me like your ass in on fire, the more I GET fucking ANNOYED.

Me annoyed = not getting what you want.

CONCLUSION : Say your peace and be done with it. I'll get to it okay. Im not deaf.

P/S :
It is beyond me why humans trash talk oh-so-much.
Goddamnit, everyone has a right to their own personal preferences, likes and dislikes.
Sure, you're entitled to your own opinion, but time and time again i stress.

If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything.

Why risk someone getting upset?
Why make someone feel as if they're not good enough?

Think before you open your mouth cause before you know it, it will be too late.

Fed-up

Horribly disappointing.

2011-11-11T21:18:00.003+08:00

Horribly disappointing.

Okay so, its 11/11/11.
It might or might not be
Exactly 11.11 PM

BUT IM NOT IMPRESSED.

Why?

Because today was suppose to be special.

But EVERYONE EVERYWHERE is talking about how 11/11/11 is suppose to change their lives and other bullshitty things.

Seriously people?

Its not a miracle day, its not a day whereby fairytales suddenly come true.
Stop whining just because your day wasn't as spectacular as you hoped.

Depressing as it is. You wouldn't complain if it was a normal day.

So why complain now?
Get over it.

So much for 11/11/11 being special.
Pfffft.

It's just a wish between you and me

Surprise!

2011-11-09T22:41:00.006+08:00

Surprise!

Im guessing after reading this you guise would shit in your pants once you see it.
But nevertheless, here goes.

So i went to Berjaya Times Square with my mum and sis.
We were shopping
(next post would be about my crazy shopping spree)
And i manage to score some nice deals! :D
Real happy bout that.

But i guess your not interested in that.

FINE.

Im sure you're itching to find out what is it.

I reached the 6th floor and there were alot of beauty saloon's and tattoo parlors around.
So i ventured into one and...

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

I GOT A TATTOO

LIKE FREAKING REALLY.

NO KIDDING

No it's not fake!
It was insanely red when i was done with it.
Kinda gross.

But final verdict, I LIKE IT! :D
No regrets what so ever.

Surprised eh?

I don't know why i got it, to be honest.
It was just something i did in the spur of the moment.
But again, i do like it!

The huge question i bet most of you are dying to ask me.

IS IT PAINFUL?

YES, fuck yes i was so close to the brink of insanity.
Lol, jk.
Well... it is.
But not the sort of pain whereby you feel as if you're gonna pass out.
But im not gonna lie and say it's not painful.
It is, and extremely uncomfortable.

It was red and swollen for 16 hours or so.
Then it went back to normal.
Like in the picture.

Okay besides that, i have another thing to tell you guys.
Keep up the pace people, don't get left behind.

But i think you guys had this one coming.

The tattoo is fake.

TROLOLOLOLOL.

Sorry, just had to do it.
Couldn't resist.

So yes, it is just a stick-on tattoo.
But i really do like it despite it being temporary.

Haaaaah, my blog is getting so dead and boring.
Needed something to make you go

O_O WHATTHEFUCK?!

Heh.

"Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." - Forest Gump

Be more spontaneous in life people.
It cures boredom.

Sometimes , more often than not.
I wish i wasn't alone.

Mess Around

2011-10-29T00:31:00.007+08:00

Mess Around

Random bokeh effect picture of me?
:D

Okay, went to ChicPop #10 at Jaya One yesterday
(29/10/2011)
With TL, JO & JY
The usual bunch minus Stan cause he tak de transport.

It was rather disappointing.
I mean none of the clothes there were cheap.
There were some nice ones for like RM 40++
So i mean, its not a flee market if it ain't cheap right?
But oh well.
Really wanted to buy this bag, but by the time i got to it.
IT WAS SOLD OUT.
Ughh, regret.

Anyway, we ditched Jaya One like after a couple of hours.
And after endless moody & cranky discussions.
We FINALLY agreed on KLCC.

Btw, i cant even begin to count the number of Taman Sea-ians that we saw in those very few hours at Chicpop.

It was like some sort of SMKTS field trip.

So anyway,
Im not gonna bore you with the story of how we got there or what we did there.
Just look at the ~~(not so)~~ pretty pictures.
Most pictures were taken in KLCC park.
Except for the first few which was in Jaya One.

Jaya One Entrance

~~Like like like~~ love these two pictures!
So hilarious and its just, perfect.
"Motion" Picture
Semi-candid. ♥
Moments like this are so perfect.
♥

Off to KLCC!
Lunch At "The Apartment"

Pasta

Fish & ChipsWe actually had 3 dishes and shared.
But the calamari salad (TL's choice btw)
Was sorta horrible, so we din't take a picture of it.
Haaaah.

KLCC Park!
This picture is so darn cute.
I can't even believe the real person is actually evil as heck.
Looks can be deceiving indeed.
My beloved partner in crime.
Two peas in a pod.

It was a rather fun and spontaneous moment for us.
I miss these chickens more than i thought.

IKEA, we're coming for you. soon.

Updates on work below :

Turns out my boss's momma wasn't all bad at all.
She's really caring and a little fussy.
But not difficult.
So im still a relatively happy camper.
However, it is rather tiring.
And im beginning to doubt my job and its been only a week.
I think i was too hasty in accepting the job.
And i dont think my pay is enough.
Sighh.
Stupid girl.

It's not fair

Houston, we got a problem

2011-10-21T22:06:00.005+08:00

Houston, we got a problem

1. MY LEGS ARE KILLING ME.

Okay, it hasn't even been a week yet.
And my legs feel as if they might just go limp on me ~~very soon.~~ now
Ughhh, i think by the time im done with the job i'll probably win the Guinness World Record for longest person to stand hands down.
No kidding.
Im like standing for bloody 8 hours a day.
Without breaks.
(okay fineeee, maybe a 5 min break every 3 hours)

2. CRANKY CUSTOMERS

Okay, i was waiting for this day to come since i started to job.
But to my surprise there weren't any.
So here i was thinking

Heyy, customers aren't all that bad after all ey?

But, as usual.
Reality proves me wrong, time and time again.

I met my first cranky ol' customer today.

Story time :

There i was, minding my own business at the cashier
Then some cranky geezer guy wearing khaki Hawaiian pants came in and started scolding me in Chinese.

I was like ...

Then i POLITELY told him i don't understand chinese.
So then...

He started going all

"THIS SHOP CUT-THROAT WAN AH. SO EXPENSIVE. HA, I THINK COST PRICE ONLY 50CENTS. SO EXPENSIVE. YOU THINK YOU ALL WHO AH -insert other blah blah blah blah here-"

Then i was like (fantasy)

(reality)
Then he just left abruptly and kept glaring at me as he exited like

AT LEAST FIVE TIMES.
Before he was finally out of sight.

Not exaggerated.

SHEESH old man.
No one FORCED you to buy anything.
I din't even approach you.

I don't get it,
if you think your poor broke ass can't afford anything other than those pants,
then just mind your own business and leave.
Why embarrass yourself further?

But to be honest, i wasn't mad.
It was amusing tho.
So far that was my only horrible customer to date.
We'll see in the future.

My bosses haven't actually been giving me any hard time yet.
So im good :)
But uhhh, i heard my bosses' mamma is kinda cranky.
And she just came back from Sg and is going to be in there everyday starting tomorrow.

Whooopie dooooooo -.-''

Well let's just hope its not as bad as it sounds.

Other than that, im good.

P/S ; Gained like 10-20 followers (tumblr) today.
YAYYYY! It's been awhile!

P/P/S : Its Deepavali tomorrow.
Rest day!

Just a little out of place,
Just a little alone.

Job?

2011-10-19T19:43:00.003+08:00

Job?

Yes yes yes!

Literally rushed to my interview after school today.
(19/10/2011)
Then he told me that i had to go for training for like a week.

Nervous?
Hell yeah.
Let's just hope nothing goes totally wrong.
-fingers crossed-

Thing bout the job is.....

CONS of the job :

Its ONLY rm4 / hr.

WHO PAYS RM4 PER HOUR ANYMORE.
I mean common, even MCD is offering RM5.

But no, i promised myself that i would NOT snoop so low to MCD level.
No offense (to tucker & yew han)
I have nothing against MCD.
But no way in hell am i ever working in a fast food chain or a concession counter
(unless im getting like RM7 an hour. Then i might consider)

I'd rather keep my pride and work for less.
(quite stupid if you think about it)
But whatever.
I have an ego the size of a fat elephant anyway.

PROS :

Easy transport
Nice bosses
(er, that was my conclusion based on the interview.
But we'll see in the near future, if my boss decides to go berserk on me)
Easy-going environment

So, yes.

Im still going for this job despite it's pay.
-sigh-

So i guess I'll work and suck it up for now.
Since it's my first job with no working experience
(besides the time i worked for my dad)
Yet they're still willing to hire me and train me.

So im down for that.
And i'll see where i go from there.

Hopefully this time next year
I'll be able to get better jobs since i would have working experience.
And i'll force my sis to give me her job offers!

Thing bout my sis is ..
she never goes job hunting.
The best jobs just comes to her.

Bloody hell.

How is that possible?
She gets job offers like every few weeks.
And she get's those temporary jobs which pay you ALOT.
Like more than RM100 A DAY.

Sheeesh, i don't care.
Once i get my "working experience"
I'll just feed off her job offers and go in her place.

Guess that's all for now.
Be prepared for any #boss bitching #rants in my next post.

I wish you didn't have to suffer like this my love,
You're too sweet for that bastard anyway.

Woopie Doo Woops

2011-10-11T23:16:00.006+08:00

Woopie Doo Woops

yes, i know that the title sounds like Bruno Mars' abum.

A dull picture, fit for a solemn mood.

If you couldn't be bothered to read about my emotional crisis then leave.
But i guess since you're here, you do.
So continue reading then -smiley-

moody, restless, feverish, bored, annoyed, snappish.

I think my PMS syndrome is going on overdrive.
And no, it's not caused by my menstrual cycle.
(hey, it's science)

God knows whats wrong with me.
I feel as if everything and everyone is getting on my nerves lately.
Even myself to be honest!

Thing is, there's no specific reason why im moody.
Which means i can't solve a problem i don't have.

Dear hormones, do get controlled ~~soon.~~ real soon.
Or someone's blood would be on my hands.

Its just so damned frustrating, trying not to snap at people when they are sprouting beans on their pretty little heads with their stupid statements.

SO... i try to laugh instead.
But it comes out a little strangled, i sound like a drowning horse.
Fantastic.

And the worst part of this bitch-phase?

I get all touchy and snappish towards my friends.
Whom i know don't intend to annoy me.
And normally, they dont.

But...
due to my overdrive,
i feel like their jokes aren't even funny,
(and if you din't already know, i absolutely hate lame shows/jokes/statements)
their sarcastic remarks as plain rude and insulting.

Regarding the insult factor,
Im a bloody sore-loser, vain as bitch.
That much i know, and i gracefully admit that.

However i absolutely canNOT stand insults or losing or rejection.

YES, IM SPOILT LIKE THAT.

No, i wasn't born as a golden child.
where everything in my life was pretty pink.
I had to work for what i wanted.

However, i STRONGLY go by the saying

"If you don't have anything nice to say, DONT SAY ANYTHING AT ALL"

But to be completely honest,
I know I ain't the nicest person on the earth,
i say mean things about people as well.

Im such a hypocrite. whatever.
Another fabulous thing to add to my long list of unliked qualities yeah?

Ending this frustrating post,
with a huge SORRY.
to my beloved ones for being a bitch all the time.
I know it's hard to put up with me.
But you guys still do.
-sobs-

So, im honestly sorry for the crap i've put you guys through.
Sorry might not be enough,
But believe me, i'm trying.
to stop being so moody and annoyed all the time.
Even if am, im really trying to not show it.

P/S : In all the pent up frustration, there is one thing to smile about.
My new tumblr theme!
In my eyes, it looks gorgeous!
and tbh i din't even put much effort into editing the theme
(i usually spend 8 hours or more editing it)
Love love love.

P/P/S : Don't forget to PLEASE click the ads.
Much appreciated, x

Take me away,
For a holiday,
In MALDIVES!

Sucky Quality

2011-10-07T17:53:00.009+08:00

Sucky Quality

Things that have absolutely nothing to do with my post toady.

Lala attempt #1 : PASS (Y)

Lala attempt #2 : PASS (Y)

Lala attempt #3 : FAIL (N)

Conclusion : Im more suited to be lala with my bangs.

-------------------------

Okay, i realized long ago that whenever i post a picture on blogger.com
the result i get is absolutely horrible.
It would end up looking like some horrible phone quality cam-shot.

So... me being me.
The vain ass person that i am.
Decided to compare the difference between uploading a picture directly from my com or from a host (flikr, photobucket,blogger photo uploader)

Results :

PHOTOBUCKET

FLIKR

BLOGGER

CONCLUSION : Photobucket FTW.
Just look how pathetic does blogger photo uploader look compared to the other two.

FYI I've been posting via blogger photo uploader all these while. fml.

NOTE TO SELF : Stop being lazy, there's a huge ass difference!

Oh, Credits to Justin for the photo taken with his Canon EOS 60D
(taken while we were in Kuala Gandah for the school trip)

Sighh, how i wish i had a DSLR.
Planning to get one by next year.
But fat chance of that unless i start working during the end year hols.

Why can't my family be as interested in photography as i?
Why can't my dad just stop buying billions of normal digital cameras and just buy ONE DSLR, even the cheapest Canon would be okay with me!

Fml fml.

Oh, i spent an hour reading my form 4 senior's blog.
And she's so pretty and photogenic ITS HUMANLY UNFAIR OK?
And she's good in photography (owns a 3k cam),
And she has great fashion taste.
And she's rich (owner of a gazillion clothes)

ZJEALOUS MUCH.

why oh why is life so unfair.

But beverly, let's look at the bright side :
You're not /in debt/having cancer/poor/dying

So.. what's there for me to complain anyway.

BUT, I WILL GET THAT DSLR OKAY.
Wait for me baby.

*None of the photos in this post are edited btw (even my camwhoring ones)

P/S : Having my last PMR papers which are Maths & KH on 11/10/2011 (Monday)

THEN I'LL BE FREE ~~(till SPM)~~

P/P/S : OHMYGOD. Blogger accepts gif format now.

Now that everyone knows, bitches would put gifs in their blogs too ):

Non-substantial

2011-09-18T19:38:00.009+08:00

Non-substantial

(yes, its another ring picture ! )

To be honest, this is gonna be a sleepy ol' boring post.
But idc, i promised myself that i WOULD BLOG today.
No matter what.
So.. this is it.

Im gonna share my aspirations and wants in life.
~~(sounds so boring and ughhh righh? Ohh whatever)~~
I do hope to achieve these sometime in my life even if it takes me 30 years.

#1 - Get a job that i actually LIKE.

#2 - Have a stable and preferably large income

#3 - Be famous locally or internationally
(no, i have no intentions of being a actress or singer or model. Nothing of that sort. I just like the fame and attention i suppose)

#4 - Own a blog that actually HAVE READERS.

#5 - Own a very flashy red/white sports car

#6 - Attend a fashion show

#7 - Work in New York or Europe

#8 - Travel to Beverly Hills, L.A, Miami & New York

#9 - Manage to bring a sizzling hot guy on his knees for me.
(If you didn't get that, it means marry me ! )

#10 - Have 2 kids. A boy & girl.

~~#11 - Reach 5-10k followers on tumblr.~~

#12 - Actually have a french kiss that isn't sloppy & disgusting.

That's bout all i really really want for now.
The last one was obviously not an important !
Just thought i'd throw it in there to make it more spontaneous and less boring and mature like.

That's all i guess. Well, 15 days
Wish me luck,
You have to.

FINALLY, i got over you,
Now and forever,
I guess it took me this long to realize,
but i love you all the same,
only now as my brother, x

(scroll ur mouse on it :D)

Exams Countdown

Anxiety

2011-09-11T16:32:00.008+08:00

Anxiety

My recently made collage for my desktop wallpaper.

Mainly consist of :

CHACE CRAWFORD
ADAM LEVINE
IAN SOMERHALDER
Logan Lerman
Justin Bieber
Jared Leto
Johnny Depp
Joe Brooks
&
Others.

Like it? ;)
Me too.

Anyway,

PMR, PMR,PMR
It's all i think about.
All i dream of.
All i hear everyone talking bout.
Always in the back of my mind somewhere

Im going insane.

(and yet im not studying)

Can't wait for this hell hole to be over and done with.
Just a month.
One darn month.
And everything would be over and done with.
Never again.

(till SPM, but that's another story)

Fingers crossed everyone!

Went to celebrate mooncake festival @ Sahara ystd.
With JY,Jo,Colin,Bryan & gang.
Nothing much went down.
Oh well.

So.. 22 Days to PMR and counting

This is for lazy bastards, like me who needs motivation & reminders that PMR is ~~soon~~ NOW

(scroll ur mouse on it :D)

Exams Countdown

Right back where i started

2011-09-04T23:18:00.005+08:00

Right back where i started

Sorry bout the quality.

Well, hols hols hols.
I haven't been lazier than i have been this week.
Like in my whole life.

FYI, i made a new record for myself.
Last thursday, i woke up at like 6PM.
(i slept at 6AM btw, so yes. That was a full 12 hour beauty-sleep)
Thing bout me is that, no matter how late i sleep,
I never wake later than 3PM (before this)

Okay so...
1. Where did i go during the hols?
2. What did i do?
3. What movies did i watch?
4. Parties?
5. Relationships?

1. NO WHERE.
I literally rotted at home.
Except for the time i went out with everyone for Colin's Post-Birthday Celebration.
It was @ Tc, so as you know.
Not much to do over there.

Sorry bout the low quality photos.
My camera's with my parents
(halfway round the world i might add [america] )
So had to use JY's cam.
Credits go to her.

How i wished i had a Canon DSLR right now!

We din't manage to grab some pics with the guys tho.

But my gf's ditched me halfway.
So i spent quality time with the guys at Tuttifruitty.
It felt.. nice.

We sat and talked for like.. 2 hours? 2 and a half maybe?
I can't describe what i felt.
But it had something to do with grainy films, black and white pictures, old times
(okay, if you din't get that. Keep scrolling)
I think that was a really sentimental time for me.
Even if we practically laughed the whole time.

2. NOTHING.
I pretty much spent my time either on the computer or asleep.
Finished 3 romance books tho.
(that was my only achievement)

3.GLEE 3D!
Yup yup, watched it with a couple of people
(not mentioning their names for a reason, hohoho)

It was good.
But there were random bits of how Glee changed people's life.
Which i couldn't care less about.
But generally, it was good.
Not great but good.
(but tbh, if you're asking if i would pay for the movie. I don't think i would)

Btw, Brittany (Heather Morris) is H.O.T
If you watched the movie.
You'll agree with me hands down.

The picture doesn't do her justice.

4. A BBQ
Well technically it wasn't even mine.
My bro invited his old SMKTS friends over for a BBQ.
It was rather fun.

AND OHMYGOD.

I watched my second horror movie in my life.

FINAL DESTINATION 5.

Okay, honestly.
This movie is not at all as scary or gory as i thought it to be.
And that's coming from me
(a cowardly whimp for horror movies)

Nothing much to add to the BBQ tho,
There was a cute guy tho!
And a really pretty girl.
And my long-lost sister, Audrey.
And some other funny dudes.

That's about it.

5. Dog counted?

Haaah, i guess not.

Now this was a rather boring post.

P/S : I am now restricting myself from the computer starting now till 11 October 2011.
(PMR. The real deal)

I would still come online on weekends.
And maybe once or twice during the weekdays if i really cannot stand the thirst for the internet.
(It might be much sooner than you think)

But....
that's okay.
You wont be missing out on much.

The feeling like i ain't smart enough,
i fucking hate it,
It kills me.

Hold Your Breath

2011-08-25T18:28:00.007+08:00

Hold Your Breath

I am SO BORED of my old blog theme.
I know black and white gives it the simple and clean look.
But it's SO BORING to look at.
And i haven't changed my theme for a year or more..

So well, i've been searching and i could never find the right match.
There's always something im not satisfied about a certain theme.

So ...
I thought, why not use the same thing.
But do some major tweeks.
And therefore, this is the result of my tweeking.

Although it doesn't look like much work done.
It's harder than you think!
(spent 3-5 hours just doing this)
I changed the pictures, font, background colors and a few minor adjustments.
I was trying out all different solid colors for my columns.
And i wanted something that popped.
Something fresh and eye-raping not ~~DULL.~~

Therefore, i ended up with red.
Yeah, i know for those who aren't used to it,
it might come as an eye sore at first.
But rest assured, it really isin't that bad once you get used to it.

And hopefully to new readers, it would be shocking.
In a good way i hope.

So i hope you guys like it.
And even if you don't, you'd just HAVE to like it till i change it ;)
(which is probably soon, cause im still not 100% satisfied with it)

-------------------------------------------------------------------

That aside, here's a tip i learn the hard way.
Not related to the announcement above tho.

NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER in your life.
Mix honey with apples and plums.
THEY DO NOT taste good.

AT ALL.

No joke.
You know after seeing all these mouth watering fruits with honey on tumblr

Me being, a hungry troller (tumblr meme) thought

Hey, i could do that too -inspired-

So there i went, to chop up some random fruits.
Then added a tablespoon of honey, then squeezed a hint of lime for that extra zing.
I was actually pretty proud of myself.
And kept thinking

This is easy, i could do this everyday.

And when i ate my first bite,
I FELT LIKE PUKING.
Who knew apples, plums & honey would be THAT FREAKING BAD with each other.

YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK.

*NOTE : The honey i was using was MANUKA HONEY.
# Knowledgeable fact : Manuka honey, primarily produced in New Zealand. The bees gather nectar from the flowers of the Manuka bush, which is indigenous only to New Zealand. The honey making process is enriched by the pollution free environment of New Zealand
It is dark in color and it taste bitter-sweet.

But I think a good honey to eat fruits with is the regular normal clear honey.
Its called

HONEY BLENDS: # Knowledgeable fact 2 : While different types of honey are available, most honey, especially honey supplied in bulk, is blended to create a unique and consistent taste and color.

It's a clear honey, not as thick and gooey as Manuka honey, and the presence of bitterness is NOT there.

So... now you know.

While i on the other hand,
had a bowl of fruits drenched in bitter honey & lime.
Which tasted x2 more horrible then it sounds.
But still not as bad as durians
(NO, they do NOT taste good!)

FYI, i forced myself to crunch down the entire bowl
Cause apples and plums aren't cheap.
And wasting is BAD okay?!

I ate every freggin' piece.
Proud much?!

So yeh, despite the failure.
I think i'd try it again but of course this time with regular light-coloured honey instead of ~~healthy-organic-imported-bitter honey.~~

Fingers crossed this doesn't turn out horrible too.

P/S : Trials for PMR is FINALLY OVER.
I don't think i did my best.
Definitely made very stupid mistakes for sci & maths.
Disappointed in myself.

And now.. the real deal.

-insert dramatic Star Wars music here-

PMR, 4 October 2011.

Expecting
5-6 A's out of 7
BM is a confirmed B/C
I don't think i got an A for BM since i entered form 1.
It's always been B's and C's.

Sigh.
Whatever.

Goodbye Malaysia, Hello America ♥

My baby grew up,
IMY, the old you.

Geography nightmare

2011-08-22T20:05:00.007+08:00

Geography nightmare

Okay so obviously, the picture has nothing to do with the topic.
But whatever, i realized i haven't posted a picture of these furry things for quite a while.
So there you go, they're still alive if you were wondering.

Back to geography.
UGH. I never realized it was hard until this year's mid-term.
And today i honestly tried my best to study for an hour or more.
And yet im still on Chapter 6 Form 1.
FML.
(Trials for geo are tomorrow bytheway)
Double FML

I used to just breeze through during F1 & F2 Geography like it was general knowledge.

But BAM suddenly in F3.
Average grade : C

Bloody C.

Sighh, and since i've been on the com for longer than i should.
(3 hours)

I should get going.
But first.

It's your duty as a responsible reader to click it.
Yeah?

Cherios ;)

P/S : Started to loose an average of 3-5 follwers a day on tumblr now.
WHY?!
Oh, FINE, haters gonna hate.
Hatechu.

Im tired of rain,
i want a rainbow.

Advertorial!

2011-08-19T19:38:00.006+08:00

Advertorial!

Guys! I need your help :)
(don't scroll past this, ROAR!)

1. Scroll to the bottom of my page
2. Find the ''advertorial'' column.
3. Click on any of the ads
(dun worry it's virus free, promise)
4. Exit the page.

You DONT have to like any pages or comment on anything or buy anything.
Just click and exit that's it.
Please! :)

And if you're constantly on tumblr.
You can do the same here!
Same rule applies.

What do you get if you click it?

Uhm, well.
Nothing much ):
If i reach RM50.
Then i'll belanja you guys something.
Ahahaha, i know it doesn't sound like much.
Sorry, i dun have an DSLR or ipads or Macs to giveaway.
But i can do tumblr/blogger banners for you guys if ue want one.

Like :

But generally, please do click it.
Not for a reward but cause you're a good person *cough*
But seriously,
For me then, please?

Puhh-lease? :)

Kudos of those of you who clicked & those who bother to constantly read my blog.

-hugs-

All the right moves.

Current Obsession

2011-08-14T18:43:00.004+08:00

Current Obsession

Attempt at an artsy picture.
Im actually quite proud of it ;)
Imagine blood-red lips!
However blogger.com is making the quality look absolutely HORRIBLE.

Just got this baby at F21 for RM 19.90.
It's my very first ring.
And be damned if it's not awesome okay?

Has a rather vintage and expressive vibe.

Hah, anyway, this is gonna be a short post.
Trials are 4 days from now.
Wish me your luck.
I NEED IT.
and god knows it.

Boys are the new vodka

Empty whistle

2011-08-07T22:26:00.007+08:00

Empty whistle

(An un-edited picture, for once)
[just cause i felt like it]

Won't be posting anyting intersting today.
Just felt the need to rant and blog for no apparent reason.

Well, first, just wanted to tell you guys that i have officially given up on my 30 days
challenge.
Cause its getting old.
And i know i only have a few days left.
But i honestly don't feel like doing it anymore.

So whatever.

Anyway, my rant today would about kids nowdays.

Times have changed, no more pokemon cards.
Game boys, playing outdoors.

Everyone is just hides behind their computers.

And they feel like they can go around cyber-bullying everyone just cause they're hidden from the world.
No one will ever know it's you.

The fact that you can say whatever horrible remarks you want without ever suffering the consequences cause no one will ever know it's you thrills them.

I think all you grey faced people are a bunch of whimps and cowards.
You don't even have the balls to say whatever you want to say in person.
All you do is hide behind your Mac.

Bunch of lame-assed losers.

FYI, i haven't actually been cyber bullied before.
But whenever im on tumblr, i see all these comments on other people's pages like

" You dont deserve to live"
Whothefuck do you think you are miss perfect?

"You're an ugly fat bitch"
And im sure you can tell just by stalking my tumblr page?

Jeez, just looking at these things makes me rather disgusted at what teens have become in this generation.
I overheard this bunch of 13-year olds when i was in 1u the other day

"Jess, you're so pretty! You really don't look like a 13-year old, with make-up on"
"Should i get this RM72 shirt?"
"My dad's gonna get me an iphone 5 when it comes out"

I mean well, i dont have anything against rich kids who wear make-up.
But when i was 13.
I dint even go shopping.

Like seriously.

Obviously now, with the influence of tumblr and a couple of friends and mags.
I am too, venturing into the fashion world and everything that comes with it.
the price tags, the gossips, the current trend and so on.

But looking back at how it was when i was just an elementary school kid.
All i had was a dog, and a few best friends.
Nothing more, nothing less.
And i was literally happy, everyday of my life.

And now, i feel as if i dont own enough clothes, i dont know how to tie my hair right,
I don't have a good sense of fashion unlike my friends, i don't have DSLR like everyone else.

It's really unnerving.
And don't get me wrong.
I am generally a proud and overly-confident person.
It's just that, i find it rather sad if one just lives to impress.

Okay, off topic.
Anyway, point is.

I hate how the world is changing so rapidly and i dont like the direction its heading too.

Kids nowdays, all wanna impress each other like it's some competition.

Pooooh!

Oh well, don't know why im feeling all over the place today.
Haah, if you actually made it this far down the post.
I congratulate you, you definitely deserve a hug.

Give me your best shot.
Im still standing.

On The Highway To K.Gandah

2011-07-31T21:37:00.009+08:00

On The Highway To K.Gandah

Had a school field trip a couple of weeks ago.
(To K.Gandah, Pahang)
*Just in case you were half blind or you don't read titles*

Took a torturing 4 hours and a half to get there due to the stops on the way
(Stopped by a wallnut & bean curd factory -.-)
So tourist-like.

Our first stop was at Karak, Mcd
(Yes, its the rest stop before you head up to genting!)
Lighting was really good, so definitely had to camwhore.
But the weather had to spoil all my fun and it started to get really dark and it started pouring buckets.

Much later,
Camwhoring on the way to the wallnut factory.
Looks rather ghost-like right?
But i like my fringe ;)

When we reached the factory,
we even saw old aunties and ''ah so's'' picking out their favourite ''kacang'' brand and buying some bottles of herbal tea.

You gotta be kidding me.

Some random camwhoring shots at the wallnut factory.
Sorry, no long ass eassy on educational explanation
or pictures of how they roast the wallnuts.
These things does not interest me at all,
i don't see why you would be interested either.

On our way to the bean curd factory, managed to snap some pictures of these beautiful flowers!
So vibrant and pretty!

After the boring delays, we finally reached the long awaited destination.
The elephant sanctuary!

While waiting for the tickets to be bought.

To be honest, the place wasn't half bad.
I swear, i know it sounds rather lame and solely for tourist.
And well, it is.
There were tonnes of 'ang mo's' and barely any local people.

ANYHOW,
My point is, if you're heading to Pahang.
Be sure to check this place out !
It's clean and you're allowed to ride on the elephants, feed baby elephants which are EXTREMELY CUTE.

Plus, what really interest me was the fact that you could actually bathe WITH THE ELEPHANTS.

Like seriously! You get to go into a river and the elephants will already be there.
So all you gotta do is get your ass in the water.
Pretty cool by my standards.

Here's one getting out of the river.
Its actually deeper than it looks.
(And yes, this is where you'll be bathing with them)
[And to my surprise, it's actually pretty clean]

Take a look at this elephant nom-ing away.

Of course, more shots of your one and only ;)

Posing on an elephant?
Possible.

If you were wondering, no i did not ride on the elephant.
Cause the queue was rather long and it was scorching hot that day.
Plus, i found it a tad bit lame as after the long wait,
you only get to ride it no more than 3 minutes.
A waste of time in my opinion, however others may beg to differ.
Oh well, i guess its the experience of actually riding on an elephant :)

You could also pet baby elephants.
Which were ridiculously cute!
They were so tame and well-behaved.
They'd definitely earned a few sugar canes in my book.
GAH, just look at them.
Jeez. Mad cute.

More random pictures of us in the sanctuary.

And well before the post gets to ~~draggy.~~
I'll end abruptly.
With a picture of my fellow classmates of 3 Cempaka.

Oh oh, and this.
The elephant was actually posing for me.
:')

And also a rather good picture :)

And and lastly, a funny picture solely for your amusement.
Apparently my bus driver is still single.
Anyone interested? ;)

I hate that we're so distant now,
I hate how you don't give a fuck about me anymore.
I hate this. alot.
Why did you have to change?
Why why?

Day 22 & 23 - A personal note

2011-07-22T23:09:00.004+08:00

Day 22 & 23 - A personal note

(Yes, spot my pimples. ugh)

Oh, i wanted to start blogging again cause
i recently camwhored alot and got lots of pictures to share.
HAHAHAHA, yes. Im vain like that.
So anyway, i keep telling myself that im gonna start blogging again,
but never got round to it.
Till now, obviously, cause im bored out of my mind.

Oh and freaking trials are on the fast tracks here.
And i literally haven't started studying anything.
And i have less than a month to study 3 YEARS worth of studies.
So i guess that shows how much trouble im in right now.
And here i am, still not studying.
~~Pretty smart dontcha think eh?~~

That aside, this is what i wore today after sch.

(Too lazy to water mark or edit)

Went out to Giant so ...
English Club Shirt & Denim Shorts.
No biggie.

Letter to someone.
Hmmmmm.

Dear Mei Yi,
I honestly don't know why i chose you, but since i did.
I guess i wanna say a few things.
You've been a really great friend to me this year.
Best seat-mate ever!
You always do everything for me.
You never say no to me.
(which im very grateful! Still can't stand rejection)
You study way too much and your too smart for your own good.
But that's okay, cause i like you just the way you are.
Don't stop being you.
Oh, before i forget.
Im so happy you're not the same F1 innocent, never break the rules, scold ppl for breaking the rules, too 'staright' kinda person.
I think you'll hate me on the first day if you were still that person.
Hahaha, but regardless, i just wanna say thank you.
For always being the rajin one.
You're such a nice friend.
I doubt anyone could replace you.

Your friend since 2002,
Beverly, x

Like falling stars,
We're bound to burn out.

Day 19 & 20 - Where i've been

2011-06-29T11:26:00.003+08:00

Day 19 & 20 - Where i've been

Day 19 - A list of all the places you've lived at.

MALAYSIA.

Full stop.
Haven't migrated anywhere yet.

Day 20 - Concerts you've attended.

Good Charlotte

All American Rejects (AAR)

Aaron Kwok

Hahaha, dont ask me why i went.
I had free tickets.

Miss Nina

Bunkface

Justin Bieber

That's about it.
Alot of local artist.
Not many artist that im totally obsessed with.
Except for JB that is :P

These three words,
I've been holding back,
Gotta let you know,
Go screw yourself :)

Day 17 & 18 - Aspirations and addictions

2011-06-25T12:48:00.003+08:00

Day 17 & 18 - Aspirations and addictions

(i miss my old hair! )

Day 17 - What do you want to be when you get older?
Day 18 - Name the Tv show that you have became addicted to.

Since day 17 is rather boring, i'll be doing 2 days in one post.
This 30 day challange is getting rather boring and tiresome.
But im gonna finish it anyway, just for the sake of finishing it.

Aspirations

Originally i wanted to take up hotel management.

Then i reconsidered because when people are out there enjoying their holidays i would have to work extra time during holiday seasons.
Which kinda sucks.
Plus it'll be really hard to spend time with my family later on.
(as in my husband and kids -mature thought- )

Then i wanted to go into the marketing department.

But it's so common and well there was a lot of paperwork involved to have promotions and all.
(found this out when i was working at GSC's marketing department)
And to be honest, it was rather boring.
And office jobs are not my cup of tea anyway.

Then i thought of advertising
The pay is $$$
Plus, you get to go round doing check prints and all.
Tho there is still alot of paperwork going on.
Sghhh.

So my last resort is media & communications
Which is common and not that highly paid.
BOOOOO.

But i haven't actually decided between advertising & media quite just yet.
We'll see.

I know im not like those kids who dreams of growing up to be a doctor, an astronaut or a lawyer since birth.
Im fickle, i can't decide.
But i do know, that i definitely do NOT want an office 9-5 job.

Addictions

Tv shows..

GOSSIP GIRL.

As you can see my fav charactor would be Serena Van der Woodsen (Blake Lively)
And i think she would make a perfect couple with Chace Crawford.
They belong together!
But G.G is NOT making that happen.
Ugh ):

Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester) comes as a close second favourite.

Oh and well, im also sorta kinda addicted to The Vampire Diaries (TVD) too.

But im actually more obsessed bout these two rather than the show.

Damon Salvatore (Ian Somerhalder)

&

Elena Gilbert/Katherine Pierce [born Katerina Petrova]
(Nina Dobrev)

They look good together, and from what i hear in tabloids.
They are together in real life and have been traveling the world :')

I dont know what to think anymore.

Day 16 - The impossible

2011-06-24T14:54:00.005+08:00

Day 16 - The impossible

Day 16 - If the world were to end tomorrow, what would you do with the remaining time on earth?

I would...

Make everything right with my family and enemies.
Stuff myself with yummy stuff
Spend all my money on things that make me happy
Make out with an extremely hot stranger
Promise myself that i'll spend this day WITHOUT tears.
Go bungee jumping & skydiving

That's about all i can think of.

Oh guess what,
I just finished my tumblr banner ystd.
YES, i've said this a million and one times already.
So what?
It's hard work and im effin proud okay.
Don't ruin this moment for me ;)

Planning to make one for my blogspot.
But kinda lazy to get round to it.

Anyways, here's my tumblr banner.

Like? Like?
I like the crown & the colors.
Yayyyyyy :)
Happy max.
I think its perfect!
The colors, font, crown & everything!
(maybe i'll tone the colors a shade lighter to match me tumblr theme better)

If you're bored, go visit my tumblr ;)
{click}

I don't know what to do,
when im around you.

Day 15 - Me gusta

2011-06-22T17:10:00.007+08:00

Day 15 - Me gusta

{picture removed after 24 hours }

There, you have exactly 23 hours and 30 minutes to view it before i delete it.
(sorry din't have a better picture :X Have fun guessing who is this)

Day 15 - A picture of someone you fancy.

God, i hate that i have to post it up.
So not fair.
Way to flatten my girlish ego!

This feeling i have for him is not exactly love nor like.
It's like...

Im constantly shy around him (which is almost never for me), i stutter my words, i blush like a kid everytime im around him, our conversation keeps repeating in my head about a million times even after the conversation is over, everytime i see him my heart does this double loop thing, everytime he says hi im like "ehehehehehe hi"
Ever since that day, i kept feeling nostalgic about our childhood together.
Which was fun, simple and childish ♥
Nothing more, nothing less.

It's actually really awkward writing this out loud.
I feel so insecure, like his gonna find out.
In my heart i sorta do want him to notice that i care for him, but it's so awkward.
We're not tight nor are we close.
So, no. I don't want him to think he has a stalker on his arm.
Either way i'll be praying that the 24 hours will be over and done with QUICKLY.

This is too embarassing for my taste.
Im more of a hopeless romantic & i much prefer discretion and privacy okay.
But i said i'll do it, so fine ):
Here it is.

With that said and done,
now you know.
And i would appreciate if you kept your mouth shut.
Kay?
SHHHHHHH ! :)

I feel so close yet so far from you.
IMY.

Day 14 - Oh hot damn

2011-06-17T18:59:00.007+08:00

Day 14 - Oh hot damn.

Day 14 - Provide pictures of 5 celebrity crushes.

1. Christopher Chace Crawford

2. Justin Drew Bieber

3. Vanessa Anne Hudgens & Zachary David Alexander "Zac" Efron
(yes, they are considered as 1 okay)

4. Megan Denise Fox

5. Ian Joseph Somerhalder

I know they're all hot.
But to be honest, i like them cause they're really nice people with attitude.
They stand out from the other celebrities who puts on a fake show in front of the camera.

That aside,
regarding the Operation Malaysia by Anonymous
I think what they're doing is something to respected by us Malaysians and everyone worldwide.
They are putting their life on the line to protect us from censorship & corruption of our country.
Hell to they yeah.
Respect.

Im actually very impressed with Anonymous and i wonder how long would it be till the government finally gets the message.

With that said and done, this is just a disclaimer.
This is solely my opinion and in no way do i mean harm to our government.
I do not mean to influence anyone.
People have their own right to believe whatever they choose.

Ohh and about day 15.
I know that's the only reason you guys are visiting my blog every day.
Fine, i'll still do it.
I won't back out.
Cause im awesome like that ;)

BUT, the condition is that.

I shall only post up the picture for exactly 24 hours
(based on my computer time)

And to whoever that manages to see the picture in time before i take it down,
i would appreciate if you guys keep your mouth shut.
However, if you feel the need to gossip or tell whomever you want then by all means do whatever you like.
BUT, please don't go overboard with the rumors and gossip okay?

So.. when am i posting the picture?
Well.. that's for you to find out :)

Why do you keep haunting me in my dreams,
i hate waking up with you and her in my head,
It's already been twice,
I hate this.

Day 13 - Confessions of a teenage drama queen

2011-06-12T20:59:00.003+08:00

Day 13 - Confessions of a teenage drama queen

Day 13 - Three confessions of your choice.

1. Lee Kyleen,

You are the only person whom i've known for 3 years + and never once told a lie to.
With you, i feel as if there's no need for lies.
I don't feel the need to prove myself to you.
I don't have to create some glamorous story about where i've been or who i dated.
Cause i know you'll always be here for me even without the lies.

2. Colin Tan Yi Yan,

I know it seems like i dont give a fuck bout you sometimes.
I know i take you for granted and im constantly scolding you.
But but but, despite everything.
I care bout you ALOT okay moron.
Im always on your side and i'll always be here :)

3. He-who-shall-not-be-named.

I had a crush on my bestfriend.
I regretted being so fucked up and it's over now.

So there, three things i bet you din't know.
And now you do.
So shhhhh! ;)

P/S : School is effin' in 9 hours.
Good lord.
Please save me from my eternal boredom during class.
Thank you.

In the back of my mind,
I can't help but question,
did you ever feel the same?

Day 12 - Desktop

2011-06-10T20:40:00.001+08:00

Day 12 - Desktop

Day 12 - Screenshot your desktop.

I know she's hot, you can stop drooling now :P
Pretty boring & basic stuff since i just changed my OS (operating system)
from Windows XP to Windows 7 Professional.

So yeah, nothing much to add on but as promised
i'll show you my smurf cupcake which i never got round to eating.
Which means... my maid threw it away.

Whaaat? It was too beautiful to eat okay?
I aint no smurf killer.

Cute right?! Its very pretty :3

Oh crap, today is my official last day of mid term holidays.
NOOOOOOOO!
Shit.
WHY!?!
I feel as if i've only been on holiday for what?
3 days max?

Sigh, life's tough.
Well.
Off i go to play AuditionSEA.
Yeah, i started playing that old dead game again.

3hours + till end of holidays.
~~Fuck~~

I don't miss you.

Day 11 - Motto of life

2011-06-07T19:51:00.004+08:00

Day 11 - Motto of life

YES, I KNOW.
I got a haircut.
I already miss my old fringe-less hair.
Sighhh, my sister said i look like a damn ~~nerd~~ now.
GRAWR. Whatever.
Im gonna forever pin up my hair.
So no, you can't see it ;)

Day 11 - What is your favourite quote ?

LOVE , SEX & MAGIC - MADONNA

What more is there that needs to be said?
I'll forever stick to this quote.
(but forever is a long time...)

Anyway, that aside.
Personal matters now.
So shoo shoo, if you couldn't care less what my thoughts are.

Had my last day of work today.
Ohhhh, right.
I started working at GSC marketing department last tuesday (30/05/11)
And ironically im quitting on a tuesday too (07/06/11)
So it's officially been a week!
Hahaha, it's rather boring actually :/
But for some reason today, my last day, was the best day.
Talk about saving the best for the last.
Normally i'll be sitting in office and rotting there while stamping and issuing some vouchers to companies who wants to book cinema halls for private functions.
But today i got to go to MV (mid valley) and view the first print of coke's advert.
The experience was real interesting.

But it was so awkward when everyone was exchanging business cards and they gave me theirs while expecting me to give them mine.
And all i could do was take the cards and smile.

MAJORLY AWKWARD.

Anyway, when i came back.
My boss said it's SMRUF APPRECIATION DAY.
(only in movie industries do we celebrate random days like these!)
So we headed to IPC (Ikano power centre)
[btw, i dint know ikano changed their logo]
And when i got there there were alot of press & media.

And okay fine, i'll admit i felt so 'important' to be labeled as media instead of public!
Its like

"You are?"
"Oh, im Beverly from GSC Marketing & Media"

HAAHAHAHA.
My name wasn't on the list tho ):
Yes, there was a list.
But my boss' was so.. she got me in.
ANYWAY, so what if i wasn't in the list.
I still got the media sticker :P
Plus a free smurf cupcake and a media giftbag.
The cupcake was SO CUTE.
I still haven't got round to eating it yet.

I'll post a picture soon.

So yeah :)
I know im bragging.
But hey, i deserve to dont i?
:D

Anyway, overall i enjoyed the job experience
(so much better then school -.-)
Even though is was boring, people there was so nice!
Would probably work there again during the 2 months holiday.

Job aside, i gotta let go of some pretty depressing things.
Even though i won't say his name.
But i gotta write this out to public so i can't change my decision no more.
I can't keep chasing fairytales and story book endings.

I sorta kinda had this crush on someone.
And he was nice you know?
But nice is not enough.
I needed certainty, loyalty, knowing he'll sacrifice things for me.
But from the start he was always selfish.
I couldn't blame him, i already knew this is who he is.
Which was why i was putting this like-hate thing behind me.
But somehow he keeps popping in my head everytime i think bout close friends & crushes.

So now, since his being a selfish bastard which he is.
A nice cheerful selfish bastard.
I know it's time to fucking move on.
I deserve hella alot better than this "say hi whenever i feel like talking" situation.

Hell, what was i thinking anyway?
Anyway, what's done is done.
I can't undo my crush on him.
BUT i sure as hell can stop crushing on someone who obviously cares bout himself more than anyone else.
Like i said, his nice to talk to.
Just not somebody to count on when you need him.

So whatever.
I'll get over him and who knows?
When you close one door another one opens right?

I shall always stand tall.
And never let my pride and ego down for anyone
(unless his worth it)

Just because i like to play games,
doesn't mean i don't get hurt.

Day 10 - Choices, choices.

2011-06-05T19:41:00.003+08:00

Day 10 - Choices, choices.

Day 10 - If you could only live off of one food and one beverage for the rest of your days, what would they be?

Food

I thought long and hard bout this and my answer would be patato salad!

It mainly consist of most of my faves.

potatoes
mushrooms
spring onions
eggs

Nom nom nom!

Mmmhm, i think im happy with patato salad ;)

Drink

And of course my drink would HAVE to be sparkling water.

I know i know, an expect-able answer.
but but, i doubt u could drink anything else for your entire life and still be alive.
Imagine drinking soft drinks your entire life
You'll end up having diabetes and and and
probably live half as long as you could have.

Therefore, im still good with water.

Short post today,
but not to worry,
there's still another week of holidays to cause mischief.
;)

I don't want to know what's wrong,
cause it hurts.

Day 9 - So darn annoying!

2011-06-02T19:14:00.003+08:00

Day 9 - So darn annoying!

Day 9 - Pet peeves (people or things that annoy you)
[no, it doesn't have anything to do with pets]

Hmmmm, i guess im easily annoyed.
hahahaha, no seriously.

A. People asking me bloody retarded questions

example :

-me standing there after school like every school day-

Idiot Z : Eh, you waiting for your bus?
Me : No ah, flying home with my friend -.-

or

-me at pasar malam-

Idiot X : EH?! YOUR AT PASAR WOR.
Me: EH?!?! IM AT PASAR AH!? dint know leh. -.-

Aduiii, you serious?

B. People being late

Me : Meet you at Mcd at 11.00am
He/she : Sure sure.

- 1.30pm-

He/She : EHH, coming now, coming now. 2 mins!
Me : Sorry your presence is not needed no more. Bye.

-2.30pm-

He/She arrives : Sorry im late wei!

WOW. you really need a time schedule moron -__-

C. Repeating myself

Me : Hey, you're so cute.
He/She : Huh what?
Me : NEVERMIND.

Me: Hey, can you help me get that?
He/She : HUH?!
Me : -being rejected- ughhhhh nevermind.
He/She : Ohhh get what ah?
Me : NOTHING LAR.

D. Things going missing when i need them

Me : WHERE YOU AT JACKET?

- secretly hiding under the cushion while i turn over the entire house -

Sighhhh, annoying the hell outta me.
GRRRR.

If you don't care,
why should i?
I hate you for making me think you would change.

Day 8 - Three random thoughts bout 3 people

2011-05-31T19:40:00.006+08:00

Day 8 - Three random thoughts bout 3 people

Day 8 - Three things you want to say to different people

Finally something personal eh?
I was getting bored of general stuff.
So... random thoughts. hmmmm

1. WEE JONEE

Looking at you, makes me smile inside out ♥

2. LEE JIAO YIN

You're too picture perfect i never feel pretty standing next to yoh.

3. STANLEIGH JENKINS

You're one of the nicest people i have ever met, you'll always be my shoulder to cry on.

Those awkward glances,
The brief 'hi's,
I want to actually get to know you.

Day 7 - Bookworm much?

2011-05-29T16:52:00.002+08:00

Day 7 - Bookworm much?

Day 7 - Do you read? What are your favourite books?

LBD (little black dress) the only series of books i read.
Yeah, well to be honest i don't really like reading.
I prefer watching movies than reading.
Dont get me wrong, i do read from time to time.

So far,
i finished the entire twilight series.
i started reading the Harry Potter series.
(but never got round to actually finishing it)
i've finished the entire shopaholic series.
And about 20 other LBD books.

But that's about it.
Hahahaha, call me lazy.
But books cant keep my attention for long.
After a few chapters i'll get bored and never pick up the book AGAIN.

So :/
Now i only read chic-lit (chic literature) & romance.
Anything else just puts me to sleep.
I admit i have a very short attention span.

I guess that's about it.
These post are getting rather boring dontcha think?
I rather talk bout more personal stuff.
Ohh well,
tomorow is day 8 and and and
guess who are the 3 people i'll be talking bout?
;)

Boy you got me going in circles,
I'd like to stop playing games now.

Day 6 - Music for the soul

2011-05-28T14:35:00.006+08:00

Day 6 - Music for the soul

Day 6 - What band / musician is most important to me.

Of course you know who mine is.
I was debating between J.B or Tyson Ritter.
But i guess its J.B.
I bet you're wondering how is J.B 'important' to me?

His been really inspiring and his a good role model.
I mean, look at him.
He had nothing till a few years ago when someone took a chance on him.
And he had a hard time getting debuted but when he did.
He took the world by storm.
And look at him now.

Even if you despise him because of his looks or voice,
You CANNOT i tell you,
CANNOT deny the fact that he is bloody talented.
His been drumming since he was 3 and soon picked up the guitar.
And then followed by his singing.

His only 17 and look how successful he is.
Some people just get everything dont they?
-sigh-

But despite all his talents and publicity
I guess J.B's kinda important to me cause he thought me to never give up and
if you try hard enough, everything will turn out the way you want it to.

P/S : i do not like JELENA.
NOHHH, dont like them tgt. BOOOO.

Day 5 - To infinity & beyond.

2011-05-26T22:29:00.005+08:00

Day 5 - To infinity & beyond.

Day 5 - 5 places you want to visit.

There's loads of places i would love to visit.
But i guess these would be the main 5 that i WILL visit.
Some point or another -fingers crossed-

1. Paris

The city of armour.
How can any helpless romantic resist the temptations of playful love & absolutely stunning scenery?
Definitely no. 1 on my list.
Plus, they are really well off in their fashion industry.
I hate how every girl is model thin there.
The world is unfair.

2. Los Angeles (L.A)

The city for the rich & famous.
Legendary parties, clubs, booze, boys.
Exclusive branding.
Private limo's & jets.
HOLLYWOOD.
What more could you need?

3. New Zealand

Cute fluffy SHEEP.
Instant stress relieve.
Friendly & Eco-friendly environment.
A private getaway.
Feels like your own private island.
A place to get away from everything and clear your head.

4. Rome

World renown landmarks.
History dates back to ancient times.
Beautiful architecture.
Post cards views.

5. New york

Its NEW YORK.
Must i say more?
Every young artiste's dream.
From upper east side shopping to downtown west cheap bargain sales.
You name it, its here.
5-star bistro's & cafe's to hot dog stands & 24 hour diners.
Its the best of both worlds.
So many things to see & do.
I'll need a month.

These places offer so much.
I ~~shall~~ will see them one day in all their glory.
Till then i'll be a dreamer from a thousand miles away.

There's nothing you can do,
To save me from who i am.

Day 4 - Meaning behind my blog name

2011-05-25T16:20:00.007+08:00

Day 4 - Meaning behind my blog name

Day 4 - The meaning behind your ~~tumblr~~ blog name.

Since im doing this on blogger.com,
i guess i'll tell you the meaning of my blogger name.
Well i guess it doesn't take a genius to figure out 3 words.

My.only.heart.

I created this blog when i was standard 6,
I've had it all along. I never deleted a single post
(Although looking back at how stupid my blog was when i was 12 did make me want to delete the old posts. But whattheheck, why should i? I'll never get those moments back, ever)
I never thought of changing my link.
I like it as it is, and it might sound girly-ish & immature but its true and i like it.

SO somewhere in May 2008, i decide to create this blog cause i had to vent out my anger/emo-ness/girl-ish dreams somewhere.
And to be honest when i was creating the link for this blog, i was ~~sorta kinda~~ in love.
CHEESY, yes i know.
But it was what it was.

I was pretty much afraid of falling for him (even though i knew he liked me too) but i was VERY VERY emotional back then and i couldn't stand any more pain/discomfort then what i was already feeling.

Sooo, basicly my only heart means

i only have one heart, dont break it.

People say it takes time to mend a broken heart, but the hurt you feel from your first love is so much deeper then any other heartache.
You can never completely get over it.
(tho, his a jerk now. So im pretty much over him. 99% anyway)

Give me a sign,
I wanna believe.

Day 3 - The life of an uptown princess.

2011-05-23T18:24:00.005+08:00

Day 3 - The life of an uptown princess.

(if you're wondering what does the pic have to do with anything,
its "suppose" to show me having fun with a whole lot of retarded loves ♥)

Day 3 - Describe your day, in great detail.

I woke up at 6.40am SHARP. Brushed teeth. Changed into 'baju kurung'. Tied my hair. Had a slice of bread and ham for breakfast. Wore my shoes. Out the house at 7.18AM. Reached school & walked around with Gayithiri for 5 minutes tops before En.Ravi came and chased us out of the R&R with that blasted wistle of his. Got to the soggy school field. Watched people go up and down the stage to receive presents. I saw my a really cute guy btw! -squeels- & a really pretty girl about to take prizes. ANYWAY, it started raining around 7.50AM, thank god.

8.20AM, sweeping the bloody filthy class floor just cause i was actually THAT bored. Started planning our sleepover with Sarah & Mei. Also started planning our civics project "Kelantan Asam Laksa"(feeling darn hungry right now) Then started to chat with Mei & Han Son till recess bout all sorts of bullcrap ;)

Recess for an hour. Was dying of boredom. Talked to JiaoYin,Jonee,Tucker,Melissa,TeikLim. Recess ended, headed back to class and talked till English period. Pn Surita took us to the hall to see the teacher's day auditions. It was entertaining but nothing really good tho. There were a few pretty good ones. And some REALLY BAD ones. But gotta give it to them for having the balls to get up stage (Y) Justin dragged us back to class after 8th period. Dint get a chance to know who made it passed auditions. Headed back to class and continued talking.

School ended. Came home. Bathed, changed, ate lunch. SLEPT till 3PM. Got up for dentist appointment. Went for scaling then stopped by Giant & GSC's headquaters to pass my dad my pendrive. Came back and here i am.

Skipping tuition ;) And planning to watch Gossip Girl soon (chace oh chace ♥ )

Conclusion : SCHOOL IS BORING & idontlikeit. AT ALL. Ugh.

Im not a mistake,
Im not a fake,
Its in my DNA.

Day 2 - 20 Thoughts

2011-05-21T20:28:00.004+08:00

Day 2 - 20 Thoughts

(I think i've used this pic before, but i still like it.)

Day 2 - 10 Likes & 10 Dislikes

Likes or dislikes first?
I guess i'll go with bad, so there's smtg to look forward to?

Dislikes

1. Rejection,
(even when im asking to borrow me a pen and you say no.)
2. People not replying my text
3. People acting like we're best friends when you obviously dont know me.
4. The colour green.
5. Cheese, peanut-butter & mayo.
6. People not making an effort at smtg while i am.
7. Leaving me out of something because you thought i couldn't handle it.
8. Being in a room of friends and no one seems to bother to come 'teman' me.
(Dontfuckingditchmewheneveryoufeellikeit)
9. Waiting for anyone. Im very impatient.
10. People that go back on their promises.

Likes (Y)

1. Warm hugs!
2. Chocolates
3. Random 'good morning' texts
4. Tumblr
5. Clothes, heels, sun-glasses, handbags, accessories
6. People who would bring me out partying instead of asking me if i was okay and whether i wanted to talk about it when obviously i dont.
7. Spontaneous romantic gifts
8. Chace crawford & Justin Bieber
9. Old pictures & memories
10. Friends that would be a part of my insanity and jump in head first with me instead of asking me to stop.

So now you know eh?

Random thought.
I miss my friends right now.
No idea why. Just do.

Don't stop partying just cause the music stop,
Start making your own music.

Day 1 - Lada-dum. Think you know me?

2011-05-20T23:10:00.000+08:00

Day 1 - Lada-dum. Think you know me?

I told yah i'll get round to it after my exams.
And well well, ITS OVER.
Hell yeah baby ;)
Party time.

Okayokay, back to my 30day challange.

Day 1 - Write some basic stuff about yourself.

I'm moody, insecure in relationships, emotional, romantic, huggable, overly-confident. I'm a bitch if you see me as one. I ace in lies but i'd never use them if you're important to me. If you're special to me i'll stick with you through everything. I don't bolt at the first sign of thunder. I hate that i judge people. Justin Bieber & Chace Crawford fan. Im a proud owner of my hella awesome tumblr ;) I hate when you don't reply my texts. I like chocolates, guitars, heels, puppies, guys with fashion sense and blue eyes.

Okay well, not so basic after all.
But basic is boring.
Looking forward to the next few posts :)
& the HOLIDAYS.
x

Even if you're mad at me,
Promise me we won't go to bed angry.

30 Day Challenge

2011-05-14T13:11:00.007+08:00

30 Day Challenge

Gonna start with this after exams.
I promise to answer every question honestly.
No lies, no bullshit.

[I dont know what am i suppose to post for the Day 15 -"Picture of someone you fancy" Shit.]

5 more days of hell til its over !
Wish me luck, gonna need it.

I was born to be somebody

A little too close to close.

2011-05-05T20:04:00.004+08:00

A little too close to close.

YOU, if you're reading this,
You shouldn't be.
Go STUDY ;)

Exams are exactly 7 days away.
Fuckmylife.Fuckmylife.Fuckmylife.
I havent started anything.
And i have 3 years to study about.
Tell me,
am i dead or am i dead?

Sigh, well instead of whining, i shall get to it now.
Wish me luck for 15 days of hell.
After that im gonna party like its 2012 baby.
For now, torture first.

x

Dreams aren't that far away love.

Hammies

2011-04-29T19:29:00.007+08:00

Hammies

[Jellybean, Gummy bear & Bubbles]

Yeeeeellow ;)

Yeah, they're still alive in case ur wondering.

I know this is rather mean.
But i got tired of them.

Yes, i know.
Its very cruel.
They are animals that require love and affection.
But lately i've been feeling less and less attached to them.
Things have been so hectic lately that i don't even have the time to play with them.
(i barely have enough time to do my hw & projects for heaven's sake)
But that was during my MSSD & Jb's Concert.

Now things have slowed down and i find this week rather boring :/
Well i guess it's one or the other, right?

Back to my hammies.

So as i've gotten less attached to them,
I've paid them less attention.
Or rather none at all.
My maid cleans them, feeds them and plays with them.

Sighh, i guess im a bad mummy eh?

Im trying to pay more attention to them lately,
cause i know it's my duty to do so.
But somehow i just don't feel the love im suppose to feel for them.

And lately they've been fighting NONSTOP.
Its been getting on my nerves.
Jellybean (the smallest of the lot) keeps getting injured real badly.
She keeps bleeding til i had to separate the BULLIES from her.
But the longer i separate them, the longer they loose their scent.
Which means they hate each other more and more each day.
So now, whenever i put them together.
Even for 10 mins they start clawing at each other.
This gets really troublesome.
Now i have to separate them forever.
They used to be all cuddly and lovey.
Now they're like bloody mortal enemies.

Sigh,
worst part is i can't even punish/scold them cause its pretty much useless.
They don't/won't understand.
So they keep fighting and i dont even know how am i suppose to TEACH them that its wrong.
Stress betul.

Moving that aside,
the royal wedding was today.
Kate was so beautiful :')
Her dress was just, wow. breath-taking.
Bless them!

And i read something on tumblr.
And my heart sobbed )':

The OneLessLonelyGirl in Malaysia said and i quote :

"My name is Najihah. I am 18 years old and I’m Justin Bieber’s OLLG in Malaysia. Yes, I’m Muslim. It all started here, I still can’t believe my eyes every time I look at my pictures and videos on stage. It happened so fast, I thought I was hallucinating. My friend and I were standing on the chairs singing to Justin’s “U Smile”, when a guy approached us. I didn’t recognize who he was at first so I thought “OMG! Am I in trouble? Did I do anything wrong?” So I just looked at him. Then all I could hear was “Justin’s One Less Lonely Girl?” and I was like, “Errrr yesssss?!!” Then he repeated his question “Do you wanna be the One Less Lonely Girl for tonight?” What else would I say. “YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!” “Alright, take out your passes and purse, give it to your friend” And so he took me backstage! Along the way, I was thinking whether this is a joke? Am I being kidnapped? Why on Earth am I following a stranger that offers me to be Justin’s OLLG out of the blue?! I But then no, it was for real! I waited with the dancers in one of the tents. I must say, they were ALL very friendly. They are all nice people! The photographer even asked me to make a shout out for Justin Bieber! When Justin started singing ‘One Less Lonely Girl’, Kenny took me to the backstage and only then I met Selena Gomez. She was so pretty! I think it’s very sweet of her to wait for Justin like that. She was standing the whole time. Kenny told me, ”One of the dancers will take you onto the stage. Just sit on the chair and look him into his eyes because he’ll be singing this song for you.” So, the dancers brought me on stage, I sat on the stool and HE IS WAY BEYOND GORGEOUS, GOOD-LOOKING, CUTE, CHARMING etc. I feel so blessed to be given the chance to look him into his eyes THAT CLOSE! He gave me a dozen of roses. That explains why I didn’t jump around and hug him. He didn’t hug me because the Malaysian government won’t allow any hugs or kisses but only a handshake, so he respected their regulations and I’m already happy to even be on the stage with him. The song was over, they brought me back to my seat. My friend was freaking out. So, I enjoyed the rest of the concert! -@najihahaziq"

KILL ME ALREADY.

Envy much?
RAWR.
But if i were there, i wouldn't care bout who said what bout not being able to hug him.
I WOULD.
Screw the government and their selfish-ness.
And SELENA WAS BACKSTAGE the whole time!!
-shivers-
Sorry, im so not into ~~Jelena.~~
BOOOOO,
Its not as if i hate her so much im gonna send ~~death threats~~ but i dont like them being together.
No, its not cause im jealous.
(okay maybe a little, but i swear its not just that)
Honest. I just dont like her.
But he treats her so well!
(he took her to hawaii, HAWAII)
So if he really ~~loves~~ likes her that much,
I'll be happy for him :)

You smile, i smile baby ♥

Just ask me already?

Caught somewhere in the middle

2011-04-27T19:57:00.003+08:00

Caught somewhere in the middle

Hey, you're back :)

Somewhere between trying to get that guy and playing hard to get.
I turned out something like this?

Something tells me that acting all cool-like aint the way i roll.
-shakes head-

So,
here's me making a vouch to be...

a tad bit nicer to everyone

(yes EVERYONE, even the bloody annoying ones)

Stop cursing at trival/unimportant stuff.

Try not to get so annoyed & start yelling at people and making them feel extremely guilty.

(okay, this is my guilty pleasure, i admit. I might sound so evil but its my personal enjoyment to see the guilt on people's faces whenever they screw up something trival and i blow up and make a big deal outta things even tho im not angry at all. [tho if they screw up big time, they're long dead in my head] )

Literally stop hating people when they din't do anything wrong

( I think justin got it the worst, haha. Sorry justin)
(if you're reading this, shouldn't you at least be honered that im apologizing to you in public on my oh-too-precious blog? )

Try not to hate my class so much.

(But but but... this might take time, and i'll probably still hate it anyway but i'll try to be less bitchy to everyone in it. Really. I'll uhm. try.)

Why?
Why did i decide to change of all of a sudden?
I gotta thank GLEE ;)
(go watch S02E18!)
This might sound cliche but its true.

Somehow after watching,
I feel that people around me doesnt have to be treated like crap just for me to seem like im one badass of a girl that would rock his world.
(no doubt, i still feel like i definitely would)
[Hah, yes i know, im stuck-up like that. Blame my over-confidence in everything]

Still i have to admit that i liked playing the stuck-up bitch.
I bet what's going on in ur head is

" WTF, i never knew beverly was so effing bitchy"

HAHAHA, well i was.
I still AM good at it.
But i think i'd want to step out of this fake, plastic person before it becomes someone who i really am.

So yeah,
Here i am,
letting down my pride,
Saying i'll change cause i know its for the best.
(Y)

P/S : No one said im gonna be a saint. I still like playing the badgirl ;)
Just not everyday.

I won't let you change me.
I was born this way baby.

This is our time now. Move over biatch ;)

2011-04-22T19:09:00.012+08:00

This is our time now. Move over biatch ;)

Greetings all :)
As you all already know,
MSSD for volleyball was this week.
(so was j.b's concert!)

And wow just wow.
I had the week of my life.
Period.
Had so much fun cheering, supporting, just having fun during the matches.
Gained hella alot of experience and just playing with my girls was the highlight of my very incredible week.
God im so proud of you girls.
Every single one of you.
:')
For those who din't get to play.
Your support meant everything to us. Honest.
Thank you. x

We played 4 matches during the entire tournament.

SMKTS - SMK Dato' Harun

Score 31-30
[THAT, was a close call. I felt that we could have done so much better in that match. But it was our first offical MSSD match! So either way, im still greateful we won!]

SMKTS - BU3
Score 05 - 31
[OKAY, now this was a bad match. We literally got trashed. Hahh, tobehonest, i dont even know WHAT WERE WE DOING?! God, this is embarassing]

SMKTS - Sri Utama (host school)
Score 31 - 20
[Whueeweeet, im so bloody proud of everyone of us :') especially in this match. Best match i'd played so far]

SMKTS - CHS (Catholic)
Score 20 - 31
[We put up a good fight, Mad proud of the score!]

Fine, who wants to hear me babling on and on about how much i enjoyed it?
Im sure you're here to look for pictures.
FINE, here :)

Thank you to our sponsors ;)
We got free Revive! :)

Picture with da captain ;) Novette.

Nana ;)

Mei!

Sabby (cute no? :)

RETARDO :)

Bestie, Ky!

Madame president ;)

Bunch of really cute seniors !

Oh and the JB concert!
Went with Sarah & Bryan.
Effing epic.
His voice sounds really good live.
But i do suspect that he was lip-syncing for a few songs.
But the acoustic songs i think he sang live.
Those were really great.
His so darn hot in real life.
Gahhhh!
I dont have pictures of him cause i only took vids.
Oh and i think waiting in the POURING THUNDERING RAIN for an hour and a half was worth it.
But i think i got back my high fever.
Ugh D:
Constantly feeling sick this week.
Sighh.
But this definitely has been the most eventful week ever.

J.Bieber, i stood under the rain while having fever/flu/cough for you.
FML.

I dont care what they say ;)
(Credits to mei :D)

Feel it, Deal with it, Get over it.

2011-04-14T20:05:00.003+08:00

Feel it, Deal with it, Get over it.

Epic pic no? (Looks retarded tobehonest)

Hellooooo to all the bob's in the world :)

One word. STRESS.
UGHH, everyone goes through it.
Everyone feels it, everyone eventually gets over it.

But seriously,
you know you're in deep shit if things start piling up and you haven't the time to do anything at all.
That's my problem anyway.
Everything seems to be coming and going so quickly i barely have time to blink and before i know it, the week is over.

And week after week, PMR inch closer.
Mid-term is already on a bullet train here.
MSSD volleyball is freggin next TUESDAY.
Heck, its 5 days away.
Geografi project is due end of the month.
History is due next month.
WHAT?!!?
Ohhhh, and im freggin BROKE at the moment
Great, just great.

Im so dead.
Haven't started any of those things yet.
Ahahaha, im such a ~~failure.~~
How I wish there were 28 hours in a day.
GRAWR!!

I guess that's it for now.
Volley is adding hella alot of pressure on me at the moment.
But to be damned with it, im so in love with the sport im gonna give it my all.
Better watch out bitches(competitors), im out to get you.
NOM NOM NOM.
Joking :P

P/S ; Monthly maths exam tmr. Shoot me already.

Give me an inch and i promise i'll take a mile,
No second guesses, cause i'm known to be wild.

Rejection

2011-04-07T20:57:00.005+08:00

Rejection

(can't find another "beh song" looking picta)
(Finally no more mata sepet, be jealous 8D )

Okay, before i start my ranting.
I HAVEN'T BEEN REJECTED BY ANYONE LATELY okay?
I've been wanting to blog about this for quite some time ago.

I freggin hate rejection.
As in, i dont just get hurt/upset because of rejection.
But i get really furious and i feel like whatthefuck is your problem? kind of furious.
Okay i might be really pampered to be always getting what i want.
But so what?
I can honestly say i don't ask for many things from people.
And if i do.
I expect you to say you'll do it for me as a friend.
Obviously i won't ask retarded quesitons like

Give me a Rm100000000000
I want the moon, give it to me.
Sell to me your soul.

Seriously, i hate rejection. Im not delusional.
But I can't even stand being rejected for small matters like
example :

Me : Tucker, help me dry the volleyball pls.
Tucker : NO.
Me : Please please please please
Tucker : NO!!

*What goes on in my mind*

IAQREUTJOIUETIUAWTQJGNZGDNBJN
You bastard, what kind of fucking friend are you god damnit
Is it so hard to help me dry a freggin ball?
FINE, looks like i have to do everything myself
And you call urself a FRIEND.

Okay okay okay i know i sound so childish and immature.
But screw you and your judgment okay.
Im so used to doing things on my own without help.
So if i ask for it, i hate to be rejected.
Cause i hardly ask, and if i do... and you freggin reject me.

FINE. BE THAT KIND OF FRIEND.

Ohhh and tucker if you're reading this no, im not still mad at you!.
Just an example :P
But i was pretty mad at that moment.
But yeah, i know you were busy playing with another senior but then,
:/
You could just tell me "later" instead of a plain flat NO with that stern voice.
Im sorry, i just hate rejection that much.
Har-har.
But honestly, im not pissed bout that incident no more :)
Swear.

Anyway, off i go now.
Before this post gets too ~~draggy.~~

P/S : YAY! Played a few good volley matches today.
Mad proud of myself and everyone! I finally lost that "Im not good enough feeling".
Im back to being overly-confident. (Y)

x

Ballad of the Monalisa

Got my glasses, im out the door

2011-04-02T11:51:00.008+08:00

Got my glasses, im out the door

The sun, the beach, the bods.
Baby, im in paradise.

Sorry for the delay,
Computer's fault :/

I found this trip relatively enjoyable.
But if you were to ask me if i would be going again i might not say yes.
We took freggin 8 hrs to reach the resort
And 9 hours home.
I was literally losing my mind doing absolutely nothing in the car.
And you people din't even bother to reply my texts.
BAD FRIENDS.
:P

So to kill the boredom i was camwhoring in the car with my sis repeatedly sayingvain

absolutely vain
completely vain
vain
vain

-.-''
YES, god yes.
I admit countless of times how vain i am.
And you have a problem with it because....?
You cannot imagine how many arguments we had in the 8 hour drive there.

Attempt at an artsy short.
Not half bad right? :DD

So yeah, we left the house arnd 10+am
And we reached arnd 6.30-7
Torture i tell you, torture.

*its dark cause it was already pretty late

So there goes one entire day.
Spent in the car being bored to death.

Everyone was too bummed out to go out for dinner
so we had dinner at the resort restaurant.
(which is honestly horrible)
Everything bout my club sandwhich was
~~greasy, cheesy, oily, full of mayonnaise.~~
Absolutely disgusting.
Worst of all i don't even like cheese or mayo.
YUCK.
Most horrible hotel food ever.

But other then that, the hotel was really great.
Best part, we had the sea view rooms.
Which was literally 10 ft from the sea?

Yup, it's actually that close.
It was really nice,
I've never stayed this close to the sea before.
It's so calming.

You fall asleep listening to the sound of the waves,
and awake to the sound of the sea breeze.

The room was rather humid and sticky tho, due to the sea.
~~Not disgusting sugar sticky.~~
Just humid sticky.
But they made up for it by providing comfy slippers!
So we won't have to step on sticky floors.

Sweet eh?

Oh, and on the way back from the restaurant me and my sis came across the hotel spa.
Which was really creepy

I know it's just the lighting,
But trust me everything bout that place feels creepy.
-shivers-

Day 2, we spent most of our day on the beach and lazing around in the room.

Some picta's of the resort.

I seriously love this infinity pool facing the sea.
It's absolutely stunning to be looking out to sea,
Feeling the warm breeze,
Looking out into the vast sea,
The tingle in your heart
the feeling of freedom...

This really cute sitting area outside my hotel room.
Mad cute!
:)

And ofcourse,
the need to camwhore by the beach.

*note the black skies behind.
):

Such a waste of a perfectly good day
)':

It was cloudy and gloomy the entire day
Then it started to rain for a few hours without end.

Day 3, the only bright and perfectly sunny day!

It is almost impossible to walk to the other end.

Artsy or whaat? :P

3 generations right here baby ;)

Cause, we're so cool like that
hahahahhaa.

We also explored the town a lil later in the day.
Pretty boring, but the keropok lekor there was insanely delish!
Yummmm!

We came back just in time for the sunset.
Very majestic indeed.

Doesn't it look as if you're in some highland forest?
there was mist and everything.
To be able to see mother nature in it's glory.
Just.. wow.

And on the 4th day,
time to head home.

Im leaving my mark,
to know where i've been.

(just a figure of speech)

And again,
Spent an entire day on the road.
This time it was worst, 9 bloody hours.
Ugh, horrible.

But overall i'd say it was a relatively good holiday.

Young love murder.

Baby, I'm so back

2011-03-31T21:41:00.002+08:00

Baby, i'm so back

You awesome bunch of people.
To be still reading this relatively dead blog.
But since my computer is back from dying on me.
I shall return to blogging starting tmr!

Now im still using my lappy cause my bro is hogging my newly repaired newly installed windows 7 professional to ply his ~~oh-too-precious~~ dota.

Ughhh,
Selfish bastard.
Grawr.

Anyway, im sure you saw my doggie eh?
CUTE OR CUTE?
Insanely cute okay, artistic shot somemore
-raise eyebrow-
I took that okay.

Ahahaha, okay okay
Syiok sendiri-ing AGAIN :P

Blahhh, idk what to talk bout.
I miss not seeing you.
:/

Okay, no mushy mushy stuff.

Im just creating this blank useless post to replace the ugh -shivers- previous self loathing post.
So yeah, im up and hyper again btw! :DD

OH OH, i made it into the sch volleyball under 15 team. 8D
(tobehonest,everyonegotincausewehaveexactly12players)

-- Terengganu pictures in the next post--
BE BACK SOON!
(a definite must)

You and your stupid cuteness,
i miss you moron.

Fucking screwed up

2011-03-24T20:49:00.004+08:00

Fucking screwed up

No picture for now.
This time it's personal.

Yes, this is gonna be one of those post. Whereby, i act all emo and suicidal and bullshit. Even i have my bad days. I feel as if i need to scream everything out till im fine with it. I dont know where to start. Argh. I can't believe i played that badly today, i mean its one thing to disappoint yourself, it's another to disappoint ur team. That's one of the reasons why i never joined a sport which involves a team. Which is why i use to take up athletes, cause its all up to you and yourself. No one can ever get in a way, there's no one else to blame. Plus, no one can blame you for what you did. However, in this case, everyone would be all "that bitch, can't even ply for nuts" and yadayadayada. You know the rest. God i hate this feeling max. I mean seriously, i never thought ME of all people could play so horribly. And yes i know im not the fucking best player but heck im not the worst. But guess what, i played like one today. Ugh, super disappointed in myself. And i bet my seniors are silently cursing me behind my back. But not as if i blame them. I guess anyone would. We're all sore losers at heart. Don't you dare tell me you're not cause everyone hates losing.
Sigh thinking bout it, i know i did bad but i dun think it was the worst ever. I mean, okay i was really bad but not as if i fail at doing everything. And i think everyone could have done better ESPECIALLY ME. Im nt blaming anyone its just, i think its a team effort. And of course i admit that im definitely the stupid fucked-up one in the team so i do apologize (not like any of them is reading but for my own sake of mind anyway) I guess this is all i want to rant about for now. I really wished i did so much better and not disappoint myself. But truth to be told, i did and that's that. It's over. I shall strive to do much better and i WILL do better, just watch me.

I don't like being reassured or comforted just because I mention how I feel. I want to be comforted because you actually see I’m upset, you see I’m angry, you see I’m not feeling okay. Not because I have to bring up the words; “I’m sad”. It just doesn’t feel natural, and feels forced to be comforted if that’s going to be the case. I want to be comforted because you genuiely see and care about me; not after I have to make it clearly obvious that I need it.

End of the loathing phase.

P/S; Despite what people say, im so not doing this for the attention. Its just something that i really wanted to speak out loud about.

On Hold.

2011-03-22T18:23:00.002+08:00

On Hold

A random extremely cute picture.
(Credits to tumblr)

My Terengganu pics are on hold for a bit.
My darn computer died on me.
Sighh,
Gonna get it fixed by this week or the next.
It's been what, 3 days?
Im already dying for it to be repaired but guess what?
No one wants to bring me to the repair shop.
D:
There are 4 drivers in my hse and not ONE would take 5 mins of their time to drop me off
GRAWR.
Whatever.
At least i still have the lappy :D

Oh Oh,
My volley inter-house match is tmr.
I dont care what house you are in, if you're reading this.
You MUST give me your good luck.
I need it. ):
Like seriously.
I honestly can say im not a good player.
Average maybe, (im thinking slightly below average) but DEFINITELY need so much more practice.
So, be a good sport and give me your luck yah?
;)

P/S : Mad proud of our blue house boys volley team.
xx

Hoping for the best, anticipating the worst.
God/karma/fate : Give me the strength to fight.

P/P/S ; Im taking this seriously because quite frankly im a sore loser and ~~i dont want to seem like a loser playing my worst match out there.~~
And also i really do love volley, therefore i want to play it well :)

It takes over my mind

2011-03-13T18:31:00.005+08:00

It takes over my mind

BEASTLY.
Just watched it yesterday.
Me being a helpless romantic found it sweet.
Definitely a good movie in my book.

For my cynical sister on the other hand,
the movie was "dripping in cheese"
I had to bear her going

"CAN YOU FEEL THE CHEESY-NESS JUST DRIPPING??"
"Oh god, why is the acting so horrible?"

The whole movie.
What a drag.
BOOO YOU sis.

Movies/books/music are the only place you can escape reality and start believing in fairytales.
So yes, i admit.
I like movies where the popular too-hansome kid goes for the pretty unknown girl.
And he goes all out to please her.
Not cause i feel insecure that no one loves me.
But because every part of me just goes "DAWWWWW :')"
And that right there is a precious feeling that i would want to keep feeling.

So what if it's cliche?
So what if its cheesy?
So what if its SO PREDICTABLE you feel as if you could have done better as a screen-writer.

I like it.
Sod you if you don't
:D

Oh and at one point i swear,
V.Hudgens could pass as a 16 yr old.
She looked so cute and innocent.
Damn she's just beautiful.
One of my two favourite female artist ♥

Moving on to less sappy things,

I'll being going on holiday soon,
Near the beach mind you.
And with all these natural disasters going on.
Who knows what adventure's i'll be seeking.

Okay okay,
Honestly im not worried at all.
I dont think Malaysia is gonna be affected.
-fingers crossed-

Talking bout that,
I'd also like to give a shout out to those countries who HAS been affected by the earthquake/tsunami.
Especially Japan.
Our prayers goes to you.

Let's hope the worst is over.

*Cheers to the person that made this.

Best GIF i've seen in tumblr so far :')
It's suppose to be a GIF anyway.

So anyway i wont be posting for a bit.
And due to my trip,
I'll have to abandon my tumblr.
Damnit )':
There goes my followers count.

So i guess that's it.
I'll be back with more vain pictures that ~~you enjoy so much~~.
-wink-

P/S;
Its raining so heavily now and my dog is crawling up the stairs with that
"i know im not supposed to be up here, but im really afraid" puppy dog face.
Mad cute :')

P/P/S;
Give this song a try when you have the time.
Really sweet one too.

CLICK HERE

*Disclaimer ; Its a youtube link. Which is not owned by me.

The feelings i have bottled up,
I dont know if i should express them to you.

Pretty girl rock

2011-03-07T17:45:00.003+08:00

Pretty girl rock

[Admit it, im hot and you know it 8D ]
{uniform so potong D: }

AHAHAHAHA,
Okay laaaarrr,
I'll stop being perasan.
PFFFT,
Syiok sendiri-ing :P

Oh oh, saw my new heels?
MAD LOVE em'.
But crazy expensive.
But i think it's still worth it.
Crazy sexayy okay.
(THE HEELS LA, ish ish ish)

Actually i think this is pretty much a useless post.
Im bored, and its already March
So my bloggie needs reviving.

Next, I needa go shopping.
I wanna get those off-shoulder crop tops.
Gahhh, but i can't seem to find those.
Besides the oversize Cotton On tops.

Plus, it's been ages since we've been out together )':
Miss ue guys, max.

Oh oh, im sure y'all already know,
(duh)
But i was selling nachos today for LEO Canteen day.
Super funnnn :DD
Hot, sweaty, accidentally got cut but it was really fun.
Surprisingly morning session's aren't as ~~barbaric~~ as they seem to be.
They're patient and nice.
I so wanna do it again next year!

And believe or not,
I dint even get to eat a bowl of nachos.
I only ate ONE PIECE.
SAD OR WHAT?!!

Grrr,
Worst of all, i had lug all of the extra paper cups and plates back home.
And now i dont know what am i suppose to do with em'.

Oh and, I really liked the leo mascots banner.
So darn cute!!

Tuition in an hour.
So i guess this is all i can come up with.
I ~~want~~ need to go shopping!
Come with me?
;)

Forget the world now,
We won't let em' see a thing.

Bitch, please. My showers last longer than your relationships.

2011-02-27T12:47:00.004+08:00

Bitch, please.
My showers last longer than your relationships.

Yellloooowwww poeple.

FACT ;
The current generation is by far GETTING WORST (and of course bitchy-er)
They get me so worked up thinking of ways to man slaughter em'

Not all but quite a hand full of F1 & F2 in my school,
Need some serious attitude remodeling
It's been whaat barely 2 months
and they're acting as if they own the bloody school.

What's up with that?
Okay let me tell you bout my story.

Last friday, during BM we went to the library,
It was around 12.10-ish?
There were quite a number of F1 & F2 students there since they're session hasn't started.
Therefore, there weren't much seats left.
So me and mei found this table with only 2 F2 girls sitting and i just dumped by books there and grabbed a chair.
Then that fat bug eyed bitch kept staring at me as if it was a crime to sit at the same table as her
So i thought maybe the seat was taken so i asked
"Is this seat taken?"
POLITELY OKAY.
(okay, maybe not with sugar on top as in with that sweet iloveyou voice, but definitely polite enough anyway)
She shook her head and kept staring as if i was growing plants on my head.
And not staring of amusement or staring cause im the ~~prettiest darn thing~~ she saw.
She was giving me the "bitch stare"
Which translates to
"whatthehell are you doing here? Get lost, Im just gonna stare at her till she LEAVES"

Let me point out that i never seen that female dog in my life, ever.
So no, i never said anything to her that made her pissed at me.
Unless i was sitting on her imaginary best friend.
Then in which case, its my fault.

If ur wondering why im making a big deal out of this,
Well its cause of her blasted dog face that kept giving me the bitch stare till i bloody left!
You weren't there so dont judge.

Besides this very irrittating incident,
There are others too,
But those are not my story to tell.

So my point is,
THESE PEOPLE NEED TO LEARN RESPECT god damn it.
Im nt asking them to kiss my feet,
But they should definitely know that we're older then them,
Therefore, they can STFU and stop acting like they actually know shit
When we all know thats a lie.

Sheeesh, what is up with kids nowdays.
Is popularity getting in to their LOA heads?
Lack of attention kiddos listen up ;

You dont run the school, not even 1% of it.
Neither do i,
but that doesn't give ue right to talk big and stuff ur fat ass nose in the sky k?
And if you're prancing around with your smug face cause you think ~~you're cool~~ liddat.
AAHAHAHAHHA stop.
No seriously, stop
You look like a pug in heat.

Next time you got something to say
DONT SAY IT.
Cause quite frankly,
We dont GAF
[give a fuck]
Got that sweetie?
That's a good dog :D
Now run along and go fetch.

*Again this isn't directed at everyone, just a certain number of F1's & F2's.

If you wanna play it like a game,
Then common babe,
let's play.

Its like being stuck by lightning

2011-02-24T15:51:00.004+08:00

Its like being stuck by lightning

My eyes looks weird, but whatever.

Bonjour chérie

Last few months i've been wondering what's up with me.
Emotionally wise, i haven't been vaguely attracted since ... form 1?
THATS BAD.
Sheesh, im sure that tells you how low the standard of guys are :P
-sorry boys, x-

Back to the point,
Like a strike of lighting,
Sudden and unforeseen i fell for him
Damn i like him.
His those kinda guys where you feel butterflies and makes you think of mushy lovey stuff.
I keep thinking of what if's and what would things be like if we had smtg going on.
His the first thing that comes to me when i go to bed

Okay, that might sound stalker-ish/totally obsessed.
But give me a break, i havent felt this way since forever.
Im still psyched, his so huggable!
~~(random bit of info?)~~

Dang boy, you got me going in circles thinking bout cha'.
Which i gotta say is pretty rare for me,
i haven't actually liked or been fairly interested in someone since a long time and that dint really go well,
But im way way way way way over him now.
We dont talk at all. Like ZIP.
Sad dontcha think?

So anyway, back to this oh-too-handsome bloke
Gosh, im trying not to give everything away but but his like like gahhhhhh
Lol, see how im totally head over heels for him?
THIS IS SO UNLIKE ME BTW
Hey, at least i know im still attracted to guys and im so not a lesbian 8)
Not like i have anything against them O:
Ahahaha,

But i'll be frank.
There's probably a 1% out of 100 of me ever going out with him.
So that's kind of a bummer,
What am i saying?
I should be devastated.

But nahh, me and him go way back.
But that was light years ago.
I barely remembered what we did as kids.
Ever since high school we dint talk, till we met in leo i guess.
So yipee for leo :DD
Now i know what's it like to have those teenage crushes.

Oh and i went for leo orientation last satuday
[19/2/2011]
*for future's reference sake

Honestly, it wasn't as bad as i thought it was,
But no doubt i was still covered with slimy disgusting flour & eggs & paint
Hahaha, but it was still darn fun :)

Heads up form two's
We're gonna stand there and watch you burn next year8)

I guess that would be all.
Loves, x

It's taken me this long,
But hell, im enjoying the ride

When i kiss you i still get butterflies.

2011-02-14T14:40:00.005+08:00

When i kiss you i still get butterflies

Happy Valentine's everyone!

Time for cuddling, smooching, hugging, lovey-dovey poems
(and what not, you sick bastards)
Joke.

Gosh, my blog needs some major update.
It's like 3/4 dead.
Well anyways, as i've said many times.
School's HECTIC like crazy.
I wish it would slow down and take a breather.
Seriously, i aint going no where.
Sigh. Im always so darn tired everyday and just about never get to laze around no more.

Complaining aside,
Back to valentines.

Some say its cheesy and commercialized,
some say its sweet and romantic & some dont bother at all.
I personally think its sweet.
Call me a hopeless romantic.

Whatever.

But to be honest, you need to show some love everyday not only on special days.
But you're allowed to do stupid/romantic/silly things on special days tho :)
It makes it even more special dontcha think?

Debating bout V.days seems boring and i doubt anyone gives a damn bout what im debating over.
So i shall share some retarded & useless info
(which are actual facts FYI)

February 3 - Elmo's birthday
February 9 - Toothache day
February 10 - Umbrella day
February 13 - Get a different name day
February 14 - Saint Valentines Day
February 21 - Love your pet day
February 27 - No brainer day
February 28- Public SLEEPING day

Ahahaha, dope or whaat?
On Sleeping day, everyone is allowed to sleep in office/school.
Go home whenever you feel like it.
Sleep anywhere, wherever, whenever you like.

LIKE SERIOUSLY?!

We so need a sleeping day here.

I guess im out of interesting things to say.

Sayangs, x

Redeem a hug day in my world,
Come claim a hug anytime you like :)

I woke up in a dream

2011-01-26T14:38:00.014+08:00

I woke up in a dream

Before i start, i'll like yo introduce to you my darlings :)

Left to right ; Bubbles , Jellybean & Gummybear

Cause they're bouncy like that 8)

Okay, how did i get these adorable fluff balls?
You'd have to read on.

I woke up at 11+ in the morning and bryan told me that colin was on the way to my house.
So i was like O_O okay...
Got all dolled up

(MY DAMN MISTAKE. GRR)

We walked to TC with jun.
Met up with Bryan and dame at Subway.
Then bryan & jun ran away.
Then dame ditched us.
Then i was like whattheheck? =.=
Then after a few hundred hours [an hour or more]
I was practically furious.
They woke me up so that i could walk like an idiot around TC with colin?
Right, so not happening.

So anyway, after i started getting all fed up and started snapping at bryan over the phone.
(i feel a tad guilty now)

And this was like an hour and a half LATER.
Colin told me to go to jun's hse, so im like uh huh sure, whatever.
Can we get this over with?
Then when i reached Jasmine Towers, Bryan called just to tell me that

ohh nevermind, just go home lah. Nevermind edy.

So i was like FUCKWHATTHEFUCK,WASTEMYTIMEYOUMORONSIHATETHISWORSTDAY
OFMYLIFEIWANTTOHOMENOWGODDAMMIT.YOUARETHEWORST BIRTHDAYPLANNERSONEARTHIWANTTOBITEYOU.

Im guessing you get the picture.
Then while walking back, poor colin had to bear me saying fuck at least 35 times.
I was literally swearing twice in every sentence.
Ahahaha, my bad.

okay yeah, i was being a bitch.
I know.
But YOU try walking in 3 and a half inch heels on gravel road.
for 2 and half hours
(but these 2 hours include walking in tc too)
See i told you getting all dolled up was a DARN BAD IDEA.
How was i to know that i was only brought out of my house just come back to my house
GEEZ.

So yeah, as i was walking towards my house.
I saw alot of movement and people with colored t's going into my house and i was like O_O
So i walked in and i guess you should know what happens then :)

After my PMS moment, they were really sweet :)
Dame's mum baked a cake and they bought really pretty presents and all.
We spent most of our time building my hamsters' cage.
Eh, its very canggih okay.
Not as easy as you think.
Ohh and we had cake, KFC and some keropok.
(tucker managed to get some bacardi, alcohol-freak :P)
I really had fun :)

When my mum sent most of em home.
Me and jo camwhored, like the girls we are :)
We took some really retarded pictures.
I mad love em.
Cause i think only really close friends take retarded pics with each other.
So yes, i treasure retarded pictures with my sayangs :D

I thought this picture was seriously legit ;D
We're bad-ass darlings for life.
Don't you dare mess with us (Y)Afterwards i had dinner with family and cut another cake.
I look kinda sad here, but i wasn't i was concentrating on cutting the cake right okay :P
I love my hair here.
Wheeeee, looks mad long and wavy 8)
Yay!

Thank you so much for all the planning and for my current darlings
Bubbles, Jellybean & Gummy

P/S ; taking care of JBG is hard work :*
(fending them from my oh-too-jealous dog is troublesome -.-)

P/P/S ; Im extremely sorry for my grumbling and blah blah that day. Ahaha, who knows what got into me that day. Anyway, you guys are more then i could ever ask for.

♥

Cause when star's collide,
we make love ♔

Cause i get weak in the knees, fall head over heels baby

2011-01-21T17:37:00.012+08:00

Cause i get weak in the knees, fall head over heels baby.

Why hello YOU :)

Just managed to finish a box of tissues.
Okay i think i've blogged about this once, some time back.
But heck, i'll do it a thousand times if i so wish to do so ;)

2 words
HAPPY ENDINGS.

Every female in the world dreamed for their perfect ~~little~~ happy ending.

For that guy who brings you breakfast in bed

Who brings flowers to your concert/birthday/graduation/valentine's day/anniversary or just pops up at work one day.

Picks you up and swirls you around

Kisses you in the rain

Wake up next to him, knowing he was there all along

He giving you that oh-so-perfect kiss, you just can't help but feel like his the one.
The ONLY one.

Brings you on a vacation with his buds and is not afraid to show affection

Those sweet moments when he does random things that damages your heart.

When he points at you in a crowd and dedicates something just for you

And of course, every little girl's dream.
To get married to a guy who you just can't get enough of.
Whereby you stop saying "i love you baby boy" but start showing it instead.

The perfect wedding.

Back to my long-winded point.
I LOVEhate happy endings.
In movies they just make you teary eyed and consume a box of tissues when everything is not even real!
(what a waste, i know right?)

These perfect endings also make one wonder why dont you have a 6-pack drop-dead gorgeous extra sweet boyfriend in your bed who i might add not only brings you flowers but rides really vintage motorbikes.

But on second thought iff there's no happy ending you'll be like

The story seems incomplete when there's no happy ending.

Try imagining this.
The lead female and male lead were in a content and blissfully happy state.
Suddenly someone from the "Secret Agent Society" sneaks in and kills the male lead.
Then the female lead either spends her whole life a single angry ol' spinster
OR
Becomes a successful C.E.O of company she always wanted to work in.
Still single and happy at her life but still lonely.

Now see that,
THAT is not something to look forward too in a movie.
Okay, fine it might be more believable but heck,
Did you pay $10 just to watch something that is being experienced in reality?
NO
I paid money to very rich film makers to make a good movie with a happy ending that's satisfying.

so conclusion of it all :

A LOVE HATE RELATIONSHIP

But in my life, i know my happy ending is not anytime soon.
I keep wondering if there really is one?
Will it ever apply to me?
Will i get my dream job, dream family, dream husband?
But yet again, if i was looking for that, i'd be looking for ~~perfection~~.
Which i do not want.
Perfection is too controlled and expected.
I like surprises and spontaneous stuff.

Okay enough of what i want and back to what i live for everyday,
R.E.A.L.I.T.Y.

x

Baby you dont have to be no superman,
I'll take you as you are ♥

No it's not alright, to pretend that nothing's wrong

2011-01-11T18:25:00.004+08:00

No it's not alright, to pretend that nothing's wrong

Heyho peeps! :)

{ Even my eye medicines says FML Rolf! }

Loads of things have been going on so i dont know where to start.
I guess i'll start with my eye allergy since everyone wants to know about it
-.-

Yes, its true it was an allergy.
Why was my allergy of all places on my eye?
well.. cause im freggin special that's why 8D
To what?
it has yet to be known.
Something i do/consume everyday i guess
cause i've been having it for relatively 3 months.
It wasn't so serious till school started,
i think the dust from the first day of sch made it much worst.
My eyelids skin starting peeling and it got a lil swollen so that blurred my vision.
When it got real bad my mum made an appointment at the specialist hospital.
So i had my check up and it's actually pretty bad .
The eye specialist said that my cornea was scratched.
Like whoa, i thought it was just an allergy.
BUT anyway, the meds REALLY helped me.
I regretted not visiting the eye specialist earlier,
To be honest even now when it's better my vision is blurred a lil.
FML, im gonna need specs.
):

BOOOO-HOOO

2nd thing i want to rant about is i think my class is finally warming up now.
Not so dead and cold.
Not like im mixing with everyone, but at least we're on a hi [insert random topic here] oh okay, bye! :D basis.
It's a great start!

(but.. we're beginning to be real noisy now O: HAHAHAHAHA dai sei justin.
Thank god im no longer a monitor, as an assistant i get to shake legs and just act all innocent when things go wrong. Muahhaha awesome or whaaat? Indeed )
Homework is crazy tho, sigh.

PMR here PMR there.

Like shut up already.
I get it PMR's coming who doesn't?
But it's still early right?

(yes yes most of you can have a debate saying ITS NEVER TOO EARLY TO STUDY,
the earlier the better and blah blah well we need to have fun too okay?
Life isin't about reaching to the top of your career then look back and say "where did my life go" When you're all the way at the top, you realize you could have done things differently and enjoyed your life better)

Sorry doctor Phill moment.

I just can't stand teachers
(one in perticular)
Complaining that 3 hours of studying A DAY is not enough.
Sleeping and eating is not allowed.

Like shutthefuckup?

Okay i get it, you're telling us this for our own good
but lady, do you even have the right to judge our weekend life and tell us
"You not good, only eat and sleep and play computer, you all must study. 3 hour's is not enough. You all really no good"

My weekends are MINE stay away.
I bet her daughter used to have way too much pressure.

Okay enough complaining, back to my ~~oh-so-fun~~ lifestory.

(Despite me being practicing for the girl's volleyball team, obviously guy volleballers are much hotter ;)

Went to volleyball practice for the first time in my life.
Me & Ky was the only form 3's there.
But everyone else was just so so nice :)
Even the teacher was so dang nice.
There's a new coach from catholic tho.
His.. strict but not all bad.
His really good at what he does.
So anyway, here comes the boring complaining.

EVERY DARN THING HURTS.
Starting from my fingertips,palms, hands, limbs, knees to my leg.
EVERYTHING .

My hands and knees got it the worst.
My hands are now red and swollen,
My knees can't afford me bending or i might just topple over.

But with all my heart.
I loved every moment.
It was fun, really fun.
Painfully fun.
But heck, i would do everything all over again.

I guess that would be all for now.
My long long rant ;)
If you manage to read this far, i congratulate you!

Sharing pillows under warm blankets

The day i died of boredom

2011-01-03T17:30:00.003+08:00

The day i died of boredom

Okay so this is me dying of boredom.
Retarded but oh well.
(damn i miss my awesomely blue nails)

Im sure ue know that morning school for me has started.
FML thats right, fuck my life.
Besides the horror of waking up before the sun even rises
Im stuck in 3C where none absolutely none. zip. na-da of my close friends are here.
~~Not to be bitchy~~
Wait, it's my blog. I can be whoever i wanna be.
But judging by today,
I'll be a damn saint/nerd by time the year is done with me.
(or even sooner at this rate)

You know i always thought morning session is all about kicking-back and chill
(yeah yeah there's PMR, i fucking know, i meant discipline & rules)
But guess what, no relaxing in that area.
Oh no, none of that.
I have a dozen and 1 prefects in my class.
(and a few real uptight ones, sigh. Great just great)
IT GETS WORST i tell you.
They spot check hair,nails & socks every time we have assembly.
FML FML.

And first day of school was so bloody boring.
I was yawning all through school. Honest.
Everyone else was having a great time mingling.
Okay, no im not sulking cause i've been left alone like

NO -.-''
Im not pathetic okay, shut up.
But i mean im not comfortable with em'.
Okay im not saying im ~~socially awkward~~, i get along fine with people.
Just that i dont have that many innocent nerdy friends.
So i dont know how to mingle to that.
Ughhhh.
FML FML

So what did i do?
Oh nothing much.
Trying to get my friend whose sitting behind me to actually respond back to me because she's shy and she kinda busy listening to everything teacher has to say.
No biggie.
I'll find something else to do besides talk.
Uh huh.
YEAH RIGHT.

SCREW THIS im going to sleep then to BM tuition.